SAYING GOODBYE

To 2010 makes me reflect on other goodbyes in my life. There were some goodbyes- to family members moving, parents' health declining. Going into a New Year brings the need to try to make resolutions and change- goodbye to bad habits, lose weight, spend less money or whatever comes to mind in the moment. My cousin says he makes goals that are attainable. Positive approach. Goals unlike resolutions can be multi-faceted with baby steps. Writing down the goal or goals, starting and checking the progress made. So as we say goodbye, to what are we saying goodbye- just a date on the calendar? Arrivederci! See you again is a better goodbye. Goodbye to the year by celebrating it and looking forward to another year! Some people hope it will be a better year! It will be what it will be. 2010 brought some joys like a new grandson, ability to keep working, writing regularly, renewed creativity. What did the year bring for you? Do you have resolutions or goals or are you just going to hold your own in the New Year?

GEARING UP FOR THE NEW YEAR

Will you have any New Year's resolutions? This week between Christmas and New Year gets us all reflecting on the last year. The TV summarizes the events, best movie, best song, who was lost, best news story. What were your best moments? Worst moments? Joys? Loves? Are you glad as I am to be able to celebrate another year? Tell me your thoughts.

DID YOU HAVE A GOOD CHRISTMAS?

Is a question asked following the big day. Everyone would love to say it was great or fake it saying it was great. Most of us had a good Christmas- flaws and all- too much eating, one child that did not sit at the table, some sibling fighting, a present or two not appreciated but overall a good time. For many it was a time of missing people who were not there. Those serving overseas, living in another province or any other reason. A good Christmas is good enough. There is a magic of celebrating in a normal, family manner. Taking lots of pictures is my joy as I love to make duplicates for family and friends, scrapbook and enjoy looking at them many times. I decided a long time ago that Christmas will be what it will be! Try to do something special if possible. This year I gave some Maple Leaf autographs to my two sons-in-law as a draw on Christmas Day- they had to pick a number- 1 or 2. Frame 1 and Frame 2- David Keon was in one frame while Bob Pulford/Bill Harris was in the other frame. The autographs were from the 1962/1963 team. It was a time when the Leafs were prolific Stanley Cup winners. Since David Keon was my favourite hero of all times, I did not want to show any favouritism by giving his autograph to one over the other. It was fun to prepare and to see the reaction. It made Christmas dinner between the main course and dessert a little eventful. I enjoyed doing it. I hope they enjoyed the endeavor. Did I have a good Christmas? Yes it was good. How about you?

TRUST

I was watching a young singing celebrity interviewed by a Canadian. She was discussing how her music reflects her feelings and thoughts about life. How she wrote her own music and lyrics. The interviewer asked if she is ever cautious about sharing so much with the world? She missed the question and continued to talk about her latest album. I understood his question. The celebrity is sweet, young and somewhat naive to believe the world to be that trusting. In my training as a counsellor/therapist trust is a huge component of the therapeutic process. How to gain trust! How to recognize trust! How to keep a person's trust! Yes, be friendly, be nice but we do not have to trust everyone. We can allow the time to decide if we trust a new person or not. Honestly, not everyone is to be trusted. Being a good, honest person does not mean the rest of the world thinks the same way. Trust needs to be earned and honoured. If you are trusted with someone's information then keep it confidential. It is okay to leave a situation if trust has been broken. Trust is huge. We often forget how huge until we are caught in a vulnerable situation. So be careful to whom you share your feelings and thoughts. Definitely, be careful about anything financial. Have there been times your trust has been broken? Are you someone others can trust? What is your definition of trust?

CHRISTMAS TREE ANGEL

We used to put a star at the top of the Christmas Tree as a child. Then Tree angels became popular. When my Natasha was 5 she made a sweet little toilet roll angel for the tree. For years it was the only angel I put on the tree until I bought a pretty store one that had lights. The little angel still goes on every Christmas tree beside the new angel as reminder of the art of little hands. Do you have some special family items that are displayed every year? Do you treasure those items made by little hands or your hands?

THE GREEN SCARF

My daughter had been trying to find a green scarf for my little grandson for months in all the children's stores. He wanted a green scarf. Okay, I knit and crochet so she finally asked if I had any green wool to make one. Well , with only 7 shades , one colour was chosen. It took less than a day to knit one for him. I am a crafter so my children are used to my homemade items but they usually prefer the factory line made things. I tried to make it look like a store bought one. Bless my little grandson! Something made from loving hands is timeless!

THE RED DELICIOUS APPLE

My Mom would always put a large orange and a large red delicious apple in our stockings along with some cream candies, one big toy and small items when I was a little girl. She grew up through the Depression so fresh fruit was considered special at Christmas. We always had clementines,macintosh apples, homemade baked goods, lots of chocolates and a big turkey dinner with all the trimmings. A plum pudding with my Mom's rum sauce- yes real rum- was one of many desserts. Now we have so many varieties of vegetables and fruit all year round that it seems dated to talk about a big apple. For me, it is a reminder of something simple from a childhood Christmas. It is a reminder of my Mom and how special she would make Christmas. So I ate my apple today while preparing the Christmas dinner. I like so many other mothers make the magic for our families and make Christmas special! Are you remembering some childhood moments? Christmas brings out the nostalgia in all of us!

THE ITALIAN SEAFOOD DINNER

Christmas Eve to Italians means a large seafood dinner. Previously Adolph and I would have the family for Christmas Eve- Italian tradition as well as Christmas Day-Canadian tradition. This year it was just the two of us so we went upscale with not only the usual dishes Adolph likes to make such as bacala soup, scallops, shrimps, calamari rings but Canadian lobster tails. We said a toast to Mama- who passed away 12 years ago. She taught Adolph how to cook his delicious dishes so the Di Mambro traditions carry on. Do you do something special on Christmas Eve?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN SANTA?

Well I do. I think of the magic of believing as a child. Today I am enjoying my grandchildren's excitement about what Santa left them. All yesterday-Christmas Eve there were reports on TV and the radio telling little children where he was seen. I believe in the magic that parents do to create a happy Christmas for their families. The little extras that are provided throughout the season. But my Santa came in the way of a worker in West Kelowna, British Columbia. My Christmas parcel to my folks took an extra week to arrive there- had sent it December 5. While tracking on line daily, saw that an attempt was made to deliver it December 21. Phoned Dad to advise to check for his notification card but he is elderly and might have forgotten to go to the mailbox. Emailed family to remind him if they spoke to him, and contacted the caregiving service to try to help him get it. This morning found out Santa had delivered their parcel- the girl at the Post Office saw the package, called the folks and personally hand delivered it Christmas Eve. It is so difficult not to have all my family close at Christmas but knowing there are loving, caring people that watch out for others reminds us all to open our hearts. Well do you believe in Santa?

CHRISTMAS MOVIES

Every year I watch the same Christmas movies over and over. The Christmas Carol - the original black and white one with Alister Sims is one of my favourites. That Magic Christmas has been playing on the television. Just watched Love Actually again for another year. The Bells of St. Mary, The Christmas Story, The Santa Claus, Home Alone, Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, The Little Drummer Boy are favourites for young and old. Every TV show has their Christmas specials with sappy themes. Why do we watch them? To make us Cry? To make us feel for the season? Christmas with movies is part of our lives. Love them and watch them over and over. What is your favourite movie?

OUR HIGHWAY OF HEROS

Again today another fallen Canadian soldier travelled the Highway of Heros in the GTA( Greater Toronto Area). He was killed in Afghanistan on foot patrol- Steve Martin from Quebec. To honour our heros a stretch of highway on the 401 between Trenton and Toronto was given this designation. It is a grass roots movement of ordinary Canadians, firemen, police who line the bridges overlooking the highway to pay their respect and show the families we care as the cavalcade passes along the highway. Cars move over to make room for it. The Cars on the other side of the highway will honk, slow down to honour our loved one. When one of our Armed Forces member dies, all families across this country feel their pain. Other people wait at the Coroner's office in Toronto to give support to the families there. Hopefully, today will be the last time it will occur. Rest in peace! Canada is grateful for your sacrifice. Sorry for the Loss!

CHRISTMAS STORIES

This time of year brings out all the stories. The happy, the sad, the tragic, the inspirational and just the ordinary moments of the season. When we hear of an accident, the feeling and remarks of what a terrible time of year to have that happen- as if a tragedy in the summer is any less tragic.

Working in a hospital, we are always trying to get patients home or many of them just want to go home even if not well enough. People are more generous as the boxes of cookies, chocolates and other seasonal goodies are piling at every Nursing Station and staff room.

The toy drives, the food hampers by community groups and churches allow all of us to reach out to others less fortunate and share what we have. Many dinner tables will have some guests that are "strays" as they do not have anywhere else to go- so please join us for Christmas dinner, Italian Christmas Eve Seafood dinner, Boxing Day or New Year's. No one should be alone!!!

Our hearts go to the Armed Forces as another beautiful, caring young man loses his life in our country. Travellers stranded in Europe, just wanting to get home for Christmas. So hold off on opening gifts and have your time a few days later to accomodate those who did not make it for the real day. Emails, phone calls, facebook messages, texting will increase over the next few days and of course some last minute shopping to add to the hectic stress of this last week. I always have a few extra gifts stored just in case something comes to my attention that someone needs them. Oh Christmas with all its stress, tears, laughter, family crabbing, love, joy, the excitement of little children wanting to know what Santa will bring- what would life be without it! The pressure we put on ourselves. Then the quiet moments by the Christmas tree, sipping a favourite beverage and eating some sweets- perhaps watching a favourite Christmas movie, listening to music or just enjoying the peace of home and family. What are your Christmas stories? What brings a tear to your eye? What brings laughter? Who are you missing? Who are you welcoming to your home?

THE WINTER SOLSTICE

The darkest day of the year or the longest night the winter solstice always coincides with Christmas. Often we are told it connects us with pagan times. Old with modern- good to know we connect with those from other times. As we face the sun furthest away from us, we look to tomorrow as the sun starts to return. For me this is a very bittersweet time. It has been 9 years since a very dear friend died on this day-Larry. Although time does heal our wounds, it is always a reminder of him. Attended his funeral that year on Christmas Eve. A dear friend, father, husband, brother, colleague- well one of a kind. We always make new friends along the way but we never really replace the ones we have lost. Have you lost any friends? Do you still miss those friends? What do you do to keep their memory alive? Ironic it is a dark day!

SNOW ANGELS

A favourite childhood snow activity is making angels in the snow. Today with the help of my granddaughter- one was made.

Years ago I wrote a brief poem about them.

Angels in the Snow

As I watched the snowflakes gently drift to the ground,

I thought of Angels in the Snow.

The inner joy of laying on Virgin snow,

Waving arms and legs creating those

white angels.

I wonder if the real ones watch?

At this time of year we do think of the Christmas angel. There are so many stories with angels in the bible. People in modern times often quote angel events. Many of us do believe children must have guardian angels to survive the many near misses they experience. Do you believe in angels? Do you have any angel stories? Do you feel their presence in your life?

FAMILY GET TOGETHERS

Getting together with family and friends during the holiday season is what makes the season joyous. My daughter and son-in-law had a small dinner party at their new home. We all pitched in to bring food- Adolph made his homemade lasagna with fresh pasta. It was an enjoyable evening with the little children running around and the adults eating and laughing. Times like that are what make memories for us all. Do you have special family events? Are they a tradition or does each year bring a different event? Do people come to stay with you over the holidays? Years ago my folks would visit and stay with family members for Christmas. Are there changes in your life?

HE'S THE REASON FOR THE SEASON

In all our Christmas preparations it is important to remember Jesus is the reason for the season. In my home, there is a table full of creche items, tins and books about the Christ child. My grandchildren can play with the figures as well as we can look at the pictures and read the books about the story. Each year a new book can be added to help honour the time. Some cultures put an elaborate Creche under their tree. What do you do to keep Christ in Christmas?

O COME ALL YE FAITHFUL

Is my favourite Christmas Carol. Music makes the season so joyous. It can be tiring to hear the stores playing the same songs over and over but I never tire of listening to Christmas classics. Away in a Manger is the song little ones usually sing at school concerts or church. Silent Night sung by any choir sets the mood for the Christmas story. Songs about Santa- Santa Claus is coming to Town, Reindeer- Granma got run over by a Reindeer and a White Christmas- I'm dreaming of a White Christmas are always popular non-religious songs. The story of a good king from the Middle Ages, Good King Wenceslas bridges the gap to modern times. Angels we have heard on High reminds us of the Angel in the story. The First Noel, What Child is This, It Came Upon a Midnight Clear and of course O Holy Night are songs provided by many artists on many CDs. Sometimes we even have a favourite version of each song. Many movies and shows always include the music of the season. I like to put a selection of CDs to be played each year. Always in the background as I wrap presents, decorate the house or bake . I even have a good Kids' Christmas Favorites CD that is a blend of carols and songs. It is teaching my little grandchildren the music of the season. Do you have a favourite carol or song? Do you play the music regularly? Do you like the radio stations with continuous Christmas music? Have you listened to a Choir live or an orchestra playing the melodies? A visit to church enables us to sing our favourites. Does the music of the season bring joy to your soul?

SNOW, SNOW AND MORE SNOW

If you wanted a white Christmas, well with all the snow across the country you have your wish. Dressed in layers, my daily walks to and from work are still manageable. I have to watch out for the cars as they can slip and slide in this weather. The children always love to make snowmen and toboggan down the smallest hill. Near my home by the library there is a great hill for sledding and it is fun to watch the children enjoy it. Even in this age of everything electronic, a ride down a snowy slope is still an activity sought by all. North of Toronto the ski and snow board resorts are doing well. Do you enjoy snow activities? Or is your pleasure staying indoors and observing the winter from a warm, cozy seat?

THE POINSETTIA

Although native to Mexico and Central America, the Poinsettia has become synonymous with North American Christmas decor. Since I was a little girl there has always been a poinsettia in the house at Christmas. Usually red, the white ones are quite pretty too. The Mexican legend goes that a little girl was too poor for a present for the baby Jesus so brought him the poinsettia. One alone on a table, as a centerpiece, several lined in a row on a church altar, the plant makes a beautiful decoration in this festive season. Do you have one in your home? Do you feel it is not Christmas without a poinsettia on your table? Is it your favourite hostess gift? If so come on by!!

CHRISTMAS LIGHTS

Driving around the streets it is fun to see the light displays and what others have done.

The possibilities are endless as the same string of lights can be displayed in its own unique way depending on the imagination of the homeowner.

What would the season be without the lights? Streets with displays some elaborate and others like mine- a few strings of lights thrown around a tree. My most favourite lights are those on my Christmas tree. Some flashers and some stationary. I love to sit by the tree- reading, knitting, sipping wine, watching TV. There is such a peaceful feeling. It reminds me of my childhood as sitting by the tree was always so pleasurable. I have two other little trees with lights in other rooms. Why do lights bring joy? In religion, light is so symbolic. Do you take comfort with Christmas lights? Is your display the talk of the neighbourhood? Do you ever drive around your community to look at the lights?

GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS

Somedays I just go through the motions. Thursday, I decorated my Christmas tree without much enthusiasm and just went through the motions but low and behold it is a beautiful decorated Christmas tree. Often just doing and being make a beautiful thing happen. My sweet little grandson yesterday, was so excited with the tree. I could stop and enjoy his moment. There are days for all of us that it takes all our energy to get going and make the effort to do what we need to do. Life can be tough but putting two feet on the ground and doing what needs to be done in the day can be rewarded by the people we love in our lives. Do you go through the motions and discover the reward at the end? Do you find the energy to hang in there for whatever reason it may be? Life comes from our willingness to keep going and stay strong. Are you struggling today? Let me know and we will go through the motions together.

THE LAST MERRY CHRISTMAS SIGN

I bought this sign at a craft sale at a local retirement home several years ago. Liked it as it would be good to have by the front door in my garden by the window. The lady who sold it to me said it was the last sign she had. Her husband had died that year. He had made signs as well as other woodworking items as a post retirement hobby and some additional income. She was selling the reminder of his items. I told her it would have a good home and would be cherished. I took the sign home and realized it actually was quite special. When I pull it out each year now to put by the front door, it is a reminder for all of us there will be the last one of whatever it is ! Each Christmas I am vigilant of the fact it could be the last one for many people I love. So I always try to make it the best Christmas and not just another one. I like to think there may be something special to do. Last Christmas it was the Olympic theme. I knit red hats for the family to wear when the Olympics started and had included several items to use in our celebrations. 1997 was a special Christmas too as I knew it would be the last one for my mother-in-law Concetta as her cancer had advanced. I took a special Christmas video with her doing, talking and being so the memory would be there for us to this day. She died July 1998. There are many reasons for all of us to enjoy to the fullest. This year there is a new member in our family and my son-in-law's family has two new members. We lose some along the way but life is beautiful and we gain some new people. Are there special memories of the "lasts" in your life? Are you the person that just makes it special as if it is the last Christmas you would be together with someone you love? If we do not make the holidays special then what is it all about? Are there some firsts in your life? You have added some new ones!Tell me your special Christmas stories.

WHAT IS CHRISTMAS SPIRIT?

I heard this term today on the TV when the newscaster was describing people having Christmas spirit while they donated toys to the Toy Mountain toy drive in the Greater Toronto Area. As soon as I heard it the Christmas Spirit feeling overcame me. Of course we know what the Christmas spirit is from a feeling level. Intellectually it is hard to describe. Something overcomes us this time of year- we do feel like giving to others for different reasons. The songs, the feeling of small joys, the look on children's faces- well the Christmas spirit. To share, to gather, to eat, to enjoy the childhood magic of the season. Inviting some lonely person to your Christmas table. Having people we love for another year. Missing those who are no longer here. Hearing the Christmas story again of the Christ child and feeling the magic! What does the phrase mean to you? Are you finding it hard to describe in words as I am? Do you just feel it in your soul? Your heart? Do you have Christmas spirit? I know I do.

TAKING CONTROL

When life seems overwhelming, stop and find the small opportunities to take back control. Cleaning a cupboard, paying a bill, phoning a friend, finishing a project are small ways to ground ourselves and find some control. What do you do to help in your chaotic life?

EVERGREEN TREES

Evergreen trees are our salvation in the winter months when the deciduous trees have lost their leaves and the flowers have died. Covered in snow they are subject of many Christmas cards and beautiful photographs. In natural settings they make a winter walk enjoyable. On a ski slope they can be markers for the skier. Many Christmas light displays have encircled the trees. Most homes will have at least one evergreen tree. My tree on the front lawn is quite tall now. There are two more in the backyard. In the Spring and Summer they are overshadowed by the other vegetation. Now the green stands out like a big gardener's thumb. In some ways they are boring and many gardeners debate whether to plant the evergreen tree at all. But over the years as the tree grows taller and taller it is seen as a wise decision. Besides there are no leaves to rake- just some pine cones to be hidden under it. The winter with its evergreen trees is like life. Are we like the evergreen tree as our lives move along? Is it in the winter of our lives that our worth is really understood? Do other things overshadow us in earlier times? Even with a little white, there still is such beauty.

MOVING FORWARD

Is the latest phrase in work, business and whatever we are doing. On a committee, moving forward; in a business plan, moving forward; in our lives, moving forward!! Who came up with this term as we hear it everywhere now. Years ago it was- are you part of the problem or the solution! The current buzz words makes us all look intelligent and part of the game. Firstly, we have to understand what it really means. Of course, none of us want to move backwards or tread water or do we? Do we move forward before the problem is solved or does moving forward solve the problem? Or does moving forward leave the problem behind for someone else to fix? Does moving forward make us look busy? Intelligent? If you really listen to newscasts, planning meetings, speeches, try to determine how many times this cute little phrase is used and how many different meanings it can have!!

THE POT LUCK LUNCH

Pot luck lunches are so typical this time of year. For work, churches, social clubs and even family events, everybody brings a dish and the table is full of a selection of goodies. Surprisingly, there are usually a variety of food items. Rarely does one get 20 salads! Life is often like a pot luck. Events unfold with a mix of people, opinions and results. We never know what the outcome will be until the gathering. I like the concept of pot luck for that reason. One dish does not make the meal, but the many dishes do. Like a party- it's the people that are assembled to have a good time that make the good time. It is a trust thing- we must trust that the whole is greater than any of its parts. Do you like pot lucks? They are rather fun. Enjoy your " pot luck" of life!

CHRISTMAS SHOPPING

Christmas shopping is finished for some, almost there for others and gee I guess I better get started for a few. Had the opportunity to do some fun shopping at St. Jacob's- a sweet town outside of Kitchener-Waterloo, Ontario- about an hour drive from Toronto. Quaint stores with interesting items. Found some more presents for my family and even 1 or 2 for me. It was quite cold but the company of close friends that keep me moving and laughing made it bearable. A different Christmas shop from the Mall nearby. Do you have favourite little towns where you like to shop?

TREASURED POSSESSIONS

I was asked recently what are my most treasured possessions. Things not people-since my family is more important than anything! However, there are items that have emotional connections for me. I inherited my Dad's desk- used to play on it when I had visits with him. My Mom's Grade 8 silver medal for attendance and "being a good student". My photo albums bring great pleasure. My travel albums have been scrapbooked long before "scrapbooking" became the rage. Of course, my camera- take it everywhere and try to capture the moments. I am the one that loves to make copies of pictures and have seen the joy of others loving my candid shots. What are your favourite possessions? Is there one or do different items bring different memories?

THE CHRISTMAS CARD

This time of year brings the task of sending Christmas cards. Some people love doing them, others just want to send an email or a Merry Christmas on Facebook. The tradition is a positive one as it is a way of staying connected with different people that have come into our lives. On our honeymoon in 1971 we met two ladies on the beach- Dorothy and Marge. I still send a card to Marge in Oregon. Dorothy passed away a few years ago but was always on my list. Old work mates, High School friends, family from across Canada and even neighbours are sent a card. My cards to cousins in Italy are sent first, then ones to the United States and coast to coast in Canada. Some years the notorious newsletter is written to update everyone on the year's activities. I actually like to receive them from others as there is more information than the one liner contained in most cards. Hanging them the old fashioned way helps with the home decorating. The photo card types are always welcomed as it is fun to see the changing families. They are included in my album pages from each Christmas. Bundles of Christmas cards from past years are kept in a safe place. By looking at them periodically, little treasures can be found- a homemade child's card to a Mommy! Those bundle of cards can be a composite of one's life. Many with a family member's handwriting can be included in genealogy projects. Do you still send Christmas cards? Do you like to receive them? Or have you joined the easy way of using social media?

THE CANADIAN BARN

Barns are part of the Canadian landscape and can be found coast to coast. The barns pictured here are from Southern Ontario. From the small farm to the corporate enterprise, barns have such varied uses from horse barns to grain storage to livestock. There is an interesting book on my shelf entitled- The Barn-A Vanishing Landmark in North America by Eric Arthur and Dudley Witney published in 1972. The structure and designs are discussed in great detail. Several barns illustrated are from this area where I live. I look at the pictures periodically. I remember some barns that are long gone. At Dufferin and Steeles there was an Octagon Barn that I thought was so neat as I liked the shape. The barn- it is such a simple architectural design yet so functional. Even expressions encompass the barn- Where were you born, in a barn? A barn dance with lots of hay! A barn is so reflective of the hard work of our farmers who put food on our tables. A country drive can be so pleasurable when barns are on the horizon. Do you have favourite barns in your area? Do you find them symbolic of our culture? Does it conjure up memories of visits to a farm?

THE CHEERLEADER

We all need champions in our lives. Someone who just supports us and says job well done. Keep going, you're doing great. Nice to have you in my life. Recently, I encountered a person that was a mentor to me in my early career. Loved his style of managing a difficult moment. Questioned in a supportive manner. Good energy. Some days I hope to be that person to other people. But sometimes the negative energy around me makes it quite difficult. So I try to become my own cheerleader. Calm your energy, it's not personal, step back and listen to the other person- there's more than one point of view. I was a cheerleader in High School. Then I could do a high kick into the splits- well if I tried that now I would hurt something- very badly!!!!!!! Are you a cheerleader? Did you have cheerleaders in your life? Do you find cheerleaders annoying?

THE PINE CONE

Wherever there are coniferous trees, there are pine cones of different sizes and varieties. For some gardeners they are a nuisance. For the crafter, they are an endless source of material for a abundance of craft ideas. Many Christmas wreaths contain pine cones with colourful accessories
or they are the accessory. Plain, painted or tied with a bow- pine cones become not only
a Christmas but a winter ornament. They can be used as the base for a name card on your holiday table. A basket containing pine cones makes a simple and quick decoration. Any craft store or craft sale will have a bag of pine cones to buy at an inflated price. Folks in older times used all these pine cones creating their festive environment. The real pleasure is the joy of collecting them. A walk by a small woodlot with trees will provide enough pine cones for many projects. Small children love to touch, feel and play with them learning about nature in a simple and experiential way. During the summer months, collected and stored until ideas blossom of what to do with all the pine cones! The potential is endless. If the supply is greater than the demand, pine cones burning in your winter fireplace are equally as pleasuable. Many family memories have pine cones in the picture. Do you use these natural elements in your home? Holidays? Do you have memories with pine cones and happy moments?

THE MODERN JUNK DEALER

In past generations, people made money collecting other people's junk and selling it. We now have garage sales and sell our own junk or treasures as the new purchaser will say. Stuff is sold on ebay by individuals and now all the dealers of any collectible use it as a site. Since I am now in the process of deciding what is an heirloom and if my children really will want it- so it's a keeper, what goes to a charity, what is a sellable collectible and what I really want to save into my old age. No time to manage an ebay account, so I have done the modern thing- hired my own salesman who does all the work and takes a small commission. Although many items were provided to him, my house still needs a good cleanse. There are also some items that will just go to the curb with my garbage. As we all know, there are still garbage pickers. Years ago, my daughter and I put out an old ping pong table with net, paddles and balls to the curb. Didn't want to be bothered with the bickering to ask a minimal amount for it. It was so much fun watching people trying to get it into their car, small van and finally a person with a pickup truck won the prize. Who has been the junk dealer in your family? How do you discard of those items that need a new home? It is hard parting with some things. Amazing what an emotional attachment there can be to small items.

BIRCH TREES

Birch trees are such beautiful trees. They are grown locally and in many countries around the world. Native Canadians made canoes, bowls and wigwams from this prolific tree due to the light weight and flexibility. Unlike most trees its bark is white and can be peeled in layers. A little research revealed the Hughes H-4 Hercules is made mostly from birch wood and that's why it is called " The Spruce Goose." Many homes have a birch as the front yard tree. When moving to our current home, we planted one with four distinctive trunks. Unfortunately, it became diseased and eventually died. Do you have a beautiful birch on your property?

A SNOW FLURRY MEMORY

I was a Social Work student doing my second year U. of T. Masters field practice placement at St. Michael's Hospital in Toronto. As part of my learning, I requested cases with patients with terminal illness. One case- Renee- will always be remembered. I was a busy student, studying, researching for my placement requirements, married with commitments at home. Always in a hurry. One day when I was arriving for placement it was snowing and I was dreading the ride home if it kept up. I had many people to see that day and a paper to write later that evening. I visited Renee. She was in her bed, very ill and quiet. We started to talk but she kept looking towards the window. She told me in her soft voice that she loved to watch the snow come down, it was so pretty. And it was. We sat quietly together and watched the snow slowly descend. We talked about matters that were on her mind. It slowed my energy and taught me to be aware of the world around me. Although it was still snowing on my way home, my view of it was so different. The first snow flurry of the winter season always reminds me of her. There was a light dusting of snow today. Life lessons come from all directions.

LESS IS MORE

In our modern times when we want to do everything possible to cram as much in a day, the holiday season is always one where most of us go into overdrive. Well, stop! Decide what are the most important aspects of the season for you. Lists, planning, and writing down your thoughts help to visualize how much you are trying to do. It is easier before you start to decide what really needs to be done and eliminate some things. For example, little children find the season magical. One parade, tree decorating, making cookies should be fun activities and not chores. The visit to Santa and picture taking can be an outing and not just a filler while other errands are done. If everyone feels rushed, then the mood changes. By slowing ourselves to enjoy the activities helps to bring joy. Family obligations can be reassessed. Group functions with everyone pitching in can lessen the work on any one individual. Each year brings something new. This year for me, if I can help lessen the load on my daughter and son-in-law with the new baby, then it will happen. Another year they may help me. In my work many families can face a hospitalization during the season. There can be additional stress of how they are going to manage Christmas and hospital visits. By deciding what is important the tasks can be decreased. Less is more!! What do you do to help lessen your load? How do you make the holidays fun and festive?
Do you have suggestions?

THE CHRISTMAS WREATH

As we begin to enter the Christmas season with shopping, wrapping, card writing, partying and tree decorating, my official Christmas season starts with placing the wreath on the door, followed by Christmas lights. Of course, gifts are purchased throughout the year as they are found.

What do you put on your door? Did you make a wreath or buy one? Mine is homemade with local pine cones collected in warmer days.

WHAT IS OLD IS NEW AGAIN

Ideas, trends, favourite items recycle with each new generation. Just think of Trivial Pursuit, for example, the in game of the early 80's. Parties, get togethers, then the game collected dust and a new generation- now on the computer. Dolls that were popular for my children now have a new market. So is it time to recycle us. Getting older does not mean outdated. Slowing down but still can use those old ideas to solve today's problems. In my field, I see old ideas, concepts recycle with new labels and charts, graphs. Wanting to study another field, I bought a number of leading business books from the Rotman Business School at the University of Toronto. Guess What? The marketing principles, integrative thinking and team playing- all concepts I studied in my early Psychology courses and have used in counselling. Victorian architecture is prevalent in the new housing developments in my area. Not everything old is great. There are some old rock bands we would like to see retired- actually surprised they are still with us. Old is new again! What ideas have you seen go around and around in circles? What new trends do you match with the old? I blend antiques with modern items.

THE BLUE JEANS CAN BE BAGGY

We know we are getting older when comfort is preferred over appearance. My blue jeans are stretch fabric so I can breath when I move. There was a time that looking slimmer than slim was the motto of the day. When the middle age rolls rolled in, it was more attractive to wear jeans slightly bigger but good quality to reflect my figure. Comfortable walking shoes are a must too. The good heels and leather boots are for short encounters and distances. When does it happen - not caring about trying to draw attention to ourselves through being the best dressed in the room? For women, it can be an age thing as men are always drawn to looking at younger women. You can be an unattractive 25 year old and an attractive 50 year old but the eyes are always on the youth. So comfortable jeans are the day! No one is noticing anyway! What kind of jeans do you wear? Are your jeans baggy? Should we dress to get attention? Should we dress for ourselves? Should we even be asking the Question???

MANNERS KEEP US CIVILIZED

Canadians have been known to be a very polite people. There are moments when we can encounter impolite ones though. Our children are taught from the cradle to say please and thank you, to wait your turn. In our modern world with all its impatience it is easy to forget one's manners. Everyone is in a hurry- so leave earlier for what you need to do! Waiting- that has become a dirty word. Remember the days when you had to go to the bank at noon on your lunch break or Friday when the bank stayed open until 6- yes you waited in a long line. If you go to the bank today and they are two people ahead of you- the huffing and puffing that goes on. Today we have choices with online banking, ATMs, longer hours and even Saturday banking. I have lots of patience. If someone else was first then I can wait. If there is a traffic jam, I can wait. If the light is red, I can wait. When I chose to do a big shop and have waited in my line and have someone with the one item, I usually let that person go ahead of me as I am loading the counter. Honestly- so I do not have to have huffing and puffing behind me. Recently, I let someone go ahead who had to mention she was in a hurry as she had a long drive- there was no consideration of my day. Since I have manners I did not mention- yes I am a busy full-time working Nana with a busy schedule and needed to get home to babysit the grandkiddies after awakening at 6 a.m. to change the bed, do two loads of laundry- well you get the picture!!! Manners do let us be civilized and not get into power struggles with others. Sincere appreciation- with a Thank you so much!! Thanking those in our lives for the little things that are done. Can you please print those labels! Excuse me when you walk between some one! Do you mind if I pass by you! So much nicer and makes a nicer world. I have been criticized for being too polite in my lifetime! However, manners do keep us in check when there are times we really want to tell someone to.... - well you know those choice expressions. Would you describe yourself as someone with good manners? Does it make you feel good to respect others? Do you have trouble waiting?

THE CANADIAN TOQUE

The Toque is a common word in Canada to name a versatile winter hat that can be crocheted or knit. It originated from the Coureurs de Bois- those early French and Metis fur traders. There can be pom poms on top or tassels and a modern version comes with braids. One colour or stripes with variety of colours can be seen. Your favourite hockey team's logo can be embossed on a toque. It keeps your head warm in the winter. Everyone has a toque or even two or three. If you are a crafty person, a toque is very easy to make. Since it is a name very unique to Canada, it is used in many sketches by comedians to make fun of Canadians. What would a good Canadian joke contain if a toque was not mentioned? Do you have a toque? Is there a joke about a toque you can share? Only in Canada, eh!

HAPPINESS IS

Happiness is a relative concept. What can make one person happy might be very boring to another. We are told money can't buy happiness but we all keep buying lottery tickets or look for the next great invention to collect royalities. Happy people chose to be happy no matter what life brings them. Yes there are times of sadness, worry or accepting unfortunate circumstances. A work mate recently told a new staff- when you're here for more than six months you will not be smiling anymore. So our happiness is dependent on other circumstances or is it. When we take responsibility for our own feelings, it can make a difference in our lives. Events do come to us that give us choices to make. Those choices can be so difficult. I like to put on my game face to the world. For example, I walk through the door at work and act as if I really love to be there- good mornings, how are you, look at the floor worksheets and try to assess what needs to be. Then it happens, I really love to be there- 8 hours is manageable if the attitude is right. I believe the people I encounter deserve my positive approach to life. Sure there are days, I am glad it's time to go home. Fridays always bring the end of the week relief. Honestly, I do not have to like everything that comes my way but I can make choices how I deal with it. What do you put in your life that brings happiness? Would you describe yourself as a happy person? Or are you the one that has to see the negative side to everything? Do you blame other people or events for your unhappiness? Are you the one that walks into a room and brings the light or joy? Happiness is...... is a favourite quote of my cousin. Thought it would be good to link our blogs.

CONNECTIONS

We are all connected in some way- by age, culture, gender, family, friendship circles, profession. In different stages of our lives different people are there. Some stay with us throughout our whole lives until death separates us. Some people are with us for a short time such as High School friends- "we'll be close forever" but often university, marriage, relocation loosens those ties. Why do we become disconnected from some individuals that shared an important part of our lives? No conflict! No reason! Just life moves on? Christmas cards are a good way to keep in touch. My family is coast to coast. If we all lived closer, special occasions would be huge. Email and Facebook and other social medias are great to keep updated but it's not the same as sitting and being with someone. Lately I want to reconnect with people. Like cousins and other high school friends and old work mates. How about you? Are you longing to seek out some old acquaintances? Are there family members worth calling? Let me know your thoughts!

SUNRISE-A NEW DAY

Every day brings us a chance to renew. My morning ritual includes a quick prayer facing east where the sun rises to thank God for this day and my blessings- and yes I always have some requests. How do you begin the day? If we start with quiet energy and reflect on what we need to do then we can gear up for all the challenges ahead. Mornings with little children are always hectic but memories are made with all the little joys and sayings they give us. Having a job has great meaning especially if you have ever been unemployed. Monday mornings have a different slant! The goodbye kiss, the heating of the car, remembering the lunch and the to do list for the errands on the way home. If we stop and think about the day, we can try not to rush our lives away. Put positive thoughts and activities in place. One of my rituals is a noon hour touch base phone call with my husband. No, I do not constantly text or check emails as I want a life! I do not not plug in earphones as I want to hear the world around me! What are your rituals? Daily habits that bring meaning to your life? How do you stop and take in the world around you?

IF LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS

Make lemonade is a saying we have all heard on many occasions. We are supposed to make something good out of something "sour" in our lives. I always felt that the lemon grower was short changed. His fruit is as good as anyone else's. Besides lemons are needed with our fish dishes, make lovely garnishes on platters, and smell fresh. No matter what happens we are supposed to pick ourselves up and get going. Or are we? If we think about the drink and picture people drinking lemonade there is no going but stopping and relaxing. Perhaps that's what the saying is really about. Actually a good lemonade on a hot day is not a compromise, but a wise choice. Can even add a favourite shot of liquor and savour it! What do you think? Have this saying been taken out of context? Is it really about making a good lemonade and enjoying?

THE SANTA CLAUS PARADE

In every corner in this country, cities and towns have their own version of the Santa Claus Parade. Sometimes the word Christmas is used, go figure it's about Christmas. Sometimes to be culturally sensitive it is the Holiday parade. But really for the children it is about Santa. Our parade occurred today in Richmond Hill, there was another one in Vaughan. The Toronto Santa Claus parade is next Sunday. It used to be called the Eaton's Christmas Santa Claus parade for years-it was the one I attended as a little girl in Toronto. Years ago it became too costly so other funding was found and continues to be a Toronto tradition. Back to our little local parade. Politicians ride in open vehicles. Floats are quite hand done, not too sophisticated.Many activities are represented such as local business, charity organizations, schools, Guides and Brownies, Baton Club. The local High School played on a float- a little out of key as High School bands tend to be. The Local Police has a good Bag Pipe Band-kilts and all. The Salvation Army Band is another regular participant. Different groups will give out a flyer and the children receive lots of candy canes. Our local hospital had a float this year and I took lots of pictures for the gang- well it is where I work. There was some rain but not too cold. Do you attend your local parade? Do you even like parades? Have you ever been in a parade? Isn't it about a little girl with innocence waving at her favourite person- Santa Claus?

AN HOUR AT THE MALL

Ater completing some errands, decided to go to a Department Store for the specials I wanted. The store did not open for another half hour so went to a coffee bar- ordered a coffee and a small muffin. Rarely do I sit and drink a coffee in the Mall ( Hillcrest Mall- Richmond Hill). The other night on Grey's Anatomy, one scene had two doctors at the Mall and commenting on the "Mall People". So today I observed some Mall People. I have always liked to people watch as it helps to establish good observation skills and to be aware of the environment. The ladies that run the Coffee Bar have some regular customers that sat at the tables and chairs where I was located. There are the Mall walkers. Some walked briskly, some saunter along while two ladies walked in the opposite direction. Some people are very intense with their arm gadgets that measure their heart rate. In Canada, malls are great places to walk in bad weather, do not need to worry about the cold or falling on the ice. Some people were annoyed the Mall was not open yet. Actually most of us should have been at church. It was good to sit and observe, write some notes for about four blogs to come. However, it was one of the longest half hours I have spent. Then another half hour to shop then home. I know now why I am not a Mall person, just a shopper. I would rather be doing other things. When I shop, I have a list, may do some window shopping or browsing in stores but usually with a short time limit to be done quickly. Are you a Mall person or shopper? Do you even like Malls? The small ones do not have the selection whereas the larger ones have greater variety but it takes longer to find your car. What are your thoughts? The malls are very pretty on special occasions especially the Christmas Season. In a modern world can not live without them!

THE OLD TRUCK

Everyone likes new cars. They smell so good and give the hope of lots of good times to come. Eventually everything becomes old. When you look at this old truck in the Distillary District in Toronto, what stories do you think it brings? It is parked beside one of the buildings and seemed like an interesting picture. My cousin Roy photographed a similar picture to this one on a farm in Manitoba outside Winnipeg. What is it about old vehicles that twigs our interest? Was it moved there or did someone park and not bother to come back?

What do you think?

SPARE THE ROD, SPOIL THE CHILD

Many people have thought this biblical quotation means spanking or hitting your child is okay. I have always believed the rod means discipline. Children need guidance, routines, structure, boundaries and love-which helps them to grow emotionally. The discipline in a home does not have to be strict. Being able to say no when necessary, yes when necessary and to bend the rules sometimes like special occasions allows a child to know he/she is safe. There are many strategies as we all know to keeping order in a home. Children fall into their own routines at a young age. Their sleeping and eating patterns get established individually. Every parent knows when their little one needs to eat or sleep. Bedtime rituals like the bath, the reading of the book while cuddling on the bed gives a strong sense of comfort not just to the child but the adult. When my children no longer wanted storytime, the realization a new phase in their life had started was met with some sadness. Do you have thoughts about discipline? Do you try not to spank? Trying to be patient and not yell takes some much discipline. Do you have it? What are your thoughts?

LEST WE FORGET

On this Remembrance Day, may we all reflect on those who have served our countries. May their efforts to bring peace to the world be part of our daily mission. To those in my family- Ernie Ellis in World War One, Dad and Uncle Norman in World War two and most recently- Jim in Afghanistan. Thank you. When you have your moment of silence is there someone you always think about? What does Remembrance Day mean to you?

SUPPORT OUR TROOPS

Is on a bumper sticker on my car. Every year for the past 19 years since the First Gulf War, I write a cheery letter for the Christmas season and send a copy to all the locations where our Armed Forces are serving. The current addresses are available on The National Defence of Canada website. There is also an email address for those who prefer to email. My reward is receiving one or two letters each year from one of those locations. I have those precious letters in my Special Binder. The cutest letter from years ago had a picture of one of our service men pointing to a Christmas decoration I had sent in a package. Since 2001, only postcards or letters- I fold mine and tape them so they can be easier to assess and sent- to any personnel are allowed. If you know someone as family then you are allowed to send a package. I am sure everything gets checked through the common address in Belleville, Ontario. I like to think my letter helps fill a wall or a string of letters and cards received and may bring some joy to those who can not be home for the holiday season- just knowing the folks back home care! Do you like this idea? Is there something you can do for our troops or those from your own country? Can we all send a collective prayer, wish for all to stay out of harm's way? Can we all hope the little children there are safe?

A WEEK TO REMEMBER

Across Canada and across the world, people will be gathering at the various war memorials to remember. As you view one of the memorials pictured here in Toronto, take a few moments to reflect on what the week means to you. Does it have special meaning in your family?

WEAR YOUR POPPY PROUDLY

We wear the poppy to remember those who served our country and those who are serving now. Do we realize 152 have died in the mission in Afghanistan? Young men and women serving their country. Let us also reflect on those who have been injured and urge the VA to provide proper compensation to those individuals. My grandfather Ernie Ellis served in World War I. My Dad served in World War II along with other members of my family and family friends. My niece's husband Jim served twice in Afghanistan. Thank you to all who have been dedicated to protecting our freedoms and helping others in the world. Do you know someone who served for our country? Will you stop and reflect on what that sacrifice means?

CANADIAN LITERATURE WORTH THE READ

The 2010 Giller Prize winner will be announced within a few days. Although I have always tried to support Canadian writers, the short list for the Giller Prize always has had interesting and varied books to read. 2008 winner, Through the Black Spruce by Joseph Boyden reflected on Northern Ontario life and culture while the 2007 winner Late Nights on Air by Elizabeth Hay gave such insight into life in Yellowknife. We can all learn about others areas of our beloved country from the comfort of our homes. This year 2010, I have bought four of the five that were shorlisted. The Sentimentalist by Johanna Skibsrud only had 800 printed in the Maritimes by a small publisher that there has been a mad dash to have more printed by the Giller awards. The Matter with Morris by David Bergen, Light Lifting by Alexander Macleod, The Cake is for the Party by Sarah Selecky and Annabel by Kathleen Winter may be books to consider for gift giving in the next few months. Over the years the books of prolific Canadian writers such as Carol Shields, Pierre Berton, Farley Mowat, Margaret Atwood, Gabrielle Roy to name a few that have recorded a slice of Canadian culture have graced my shelves. Anne of Green Gables by Montgomery is world renown. My bookshelf includes non-fiction Canadian content as well. As a genealogist, many books are short run local history books. What books have you read? Do you include Canadian literature in your regular bookstore or library jaunts? Do you have a favourite author or topic? I do read popular best sellers and love mystery novels. But the inclusion of Canadian writers does support the literary and artistic communities. Are you doing your share?

ANTIQUES- THAT FUNCTIONAL INVESTMENT

Antiques never lose their value. I have several pieces in my home that I have enjoyed for many years. The pieces all have a story and were bought in various locations. My beautiful kitchen buffet from butternut wood. My dining room set- Honduras Mahogany. Several tables of pine wood. These pieces are mixed with modern ones. Life is like that- the old with the new. Mix and match. Not necessary to like just one style. Each of my rooms have different themes- from Canadiana to African to the basement with Canadian clutter- is it a style- well it works for me. Do you like antiques- things that are old with a story behind them. I even collect telephone insulators and have a purple one. My cousin Roy wrote an interesting blog on insulators. What do you think?

FINISH WHAT YOU STARTED

The creative process is a fun one to have. Mentioning to my cousin Roy, that the idea is easy but actually starting, and finishing a project is the work. Ideas are cheap and good to have. One idea can lead to another which leads to the piece of work needing to be done. Writing takes many drafts for me. One genealogical writing project I have been methodically doing is taking longer than I wanted. Every time I think yes I have enough information, another idea of what can be added comes along and more research is needed. The question I have - do I just write it for me and my immediate family or do I include others thus increasing the potential readership. I am obviously opting for the second choice which has extended the project. Anyone that writes- articles, poetry, stories has a collection that no one has read. There is the satisfaction that the writing occurred or is it satisfaction. Perhaps a venue to share has not existed previously. Some of my blogs have been laying dormant until the decision to share with the world occurred. For me blogging has become the venue to dust off many literary ideas and take a chance of sharing. Have you had written projects laying dormant? What have you done to share with the world? Are you trying to finish what you started?

CASSINO WAR MEMORIAL PART 2

The Cassino War Cemetery is in the Commune of Cassino, Province of Frosinone, Italy. There are 4265 grave markers of British Commonwealth Forces from World War Two. 855 Canadians are buried there. On the Monument with 4,054 names of individuals who do not have a grave there are 194 Canadian names. The cemetery is well kept. In the distance on the mountain is the Monte Cassino Monastery. The history of the battles in 1944 is well recorded and analysed. For me this cemetery represents a piece of Canada. Married to an Italian born Canadian- Adolph- I had always heard about the area and his hometown. When I visited this cemetery in 1991, I came away feeling that a part of Canada will always belong there. In the weeks leading up to Remembrance Day, I always ask the Veterans selling the poppies what campaign they fought. If it was the Italian campaign, I always mention my visit to Cassino. I am sure the memories of lost comrades in arms never leave them.

WAS I WORTH THEIR SACRIFICE? CASSINO WAR CEMETERY

I wrote this story several months after visiting Adolph's home in Italy in August, 1991. I tried to have it published but to no avail. Here is my recollection.

Sometimes it takes a trip abroad to discover a Canadian sense of self. While touring the local sites in my husband's hometown of Cassino, Italy, south of Rome last summer we visited the three war cemeteries in the area. They are entitled the Polish, The German and the English cemeteries.

During World War 2, the Germans had established two main lines of defense- the Gustav and Hitler lines to check the allies from advancing to Rome. During April and May 1944, there was major fighting in the area culminating with the bombing of the Benedictine Monastery on Monte Cassino. It was imperative to secure that location as it had a strategic vantage point overlooking the Liri Valley. Once captured it allowed the Allies an open road to Rome. On May 16, 1944 the First Canadian Corps received orders to advance on the Hitler line 6 miles up the Valley. The attack began May 23; Frosinone, the capital of the region was occupied by May 31. The Canadian campaign came to an end in the area as the Allies advanced to liberate Rome.

As we visited each cemetery, we noted the varying locations. The Polish cemetery is located near the Abbey where they had secured the Cassino position and the Monastery on May 18, 1944. The Polish General who died several years after the War requested to be buried with his troops. The German cemetery is located in the Valley with triple graves of soldiers as there were just too many to bury. Rows and rows of young men, which makes it difficult to picture them as an enemy now.

Our last visit was the English Cemetery or really the British Commonwealth one. Walking into the cemetery, I read the signs, inscribed on the two walls at the entrance which state,

"WITHIN THIS CEMETERY STAND MONUMENTS WHICH BEAR THE NAMES OF THE SOLDIERS OF THE BRITISH COMMONWEALTH AND EMPIRE WHO FELL IN ASSAULTS UPON THE SHORES OF SICILY AND ITALY OR IN LATER BATTLES TO FREE ITALIAN SOIL AND TO WHOM THE FORTUNE OF WAR DENIED A KNOWN AND HONOURED GRAVE. AROUND THEM ARE THE GRAVES OF THEIR COMRADES WHO DIED FIGHTING IN THESE PARTS TO OPEN THE WAY TO ROME AND THE NORTH."

The other wall bears this inscription, " THE LAND ON WHICH THIS CEMETERY STANDS IS THE GIFT OF THE ITALIAN PEOPLE FOR THE PERPETUAL RESTING PLACE OF THE SAILORS, SOLDIERS AND AIRMEN WHO ARE HONOURED HERE."

The Canadian section was quite large and distinguishable by the Maple Leaf adorning the top of each stone. It is one small cemetery of many in 74 countries that honour the 109,980 Canadians who died in the First and Seconds World Wars.

I began to read the names of the men of the regiments of the First Canadian Corps. From Edmonton, Calgary, Saskatoon, West Nova Scorch, Quebec, Ontario, British Columbia, Special Services, the Engineers and more, they were all resting in peace.. What overwhelmed me were the dates in April, May. How many had fallen together. Comrades in Life! Comrades in Death!

My Canadians! Our Canadians! Tears and emotion overcame me. I left my companions as I did not want them to see my tears. I continued to walk amongst the rows wanting a glimpse of each stone. I felt I owed them; to acknowledge their being, their worth. Young men mostly in their teens, their twenties, their thirties, who were denied a life that only those in middle age and older can appreciate that death in youth really has no rewards.

But why was I crying? I felt a sense of pride. Those men fought for us, our freedom. They believed in a greater cause. I felt a sense of anger and the realization that if every Politician and General would visit the cemeteries of the previous war, perhaps we could try to find alternatives. I felt a sense of sadness. Those men were sons, brothers, husbands, fathers, friends. They were missed at home. They did not chose that resting place. I remembered. An uncle had fought in Italy. A family friend went through there. Were those men their comrades?

All the cemeteries were very quiet and peaceful. In Europe, they are kept clean and often better maintained than the surrounding towns. Our men are honoured there. Almost fifty years buried while the living has gone on.

Would they be proud of Canada today? Would they consider us grateful of the freedoms they secured for us? Would they feel their cause was understood. Am I doing for Canada and freedom what I inherited from those men? To all those buried in the many cemeteries, am I worthy of your sacrifice?

April 1992
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A NEW MONTH

Each month brings something unique to our lives and many normal things. It always surprises me how the month starts slowly then seems to pick up speed. Is it an aging thing? November has two family birthdays, Remembrance Day and the need to prepare for Christmas. Do you find the days fly by? Or is it just me?

HALLOWEEN

Halloween brings out the child in all of us. Next to Christmas it is the most fun time. You go door to door and get lots of candies and other good stuff. Today we package all the candies so there is no possibility of any tampering. When I was a little girl, my favourite house gave out homemade candy apples. It seemed so amazing as some houses just gave those horrible wrapped halloween candies- 1- just one. Our costumes were handmade- sometimes just an old shirt and lots of makeup. Now there is such a variety for not only children but adults who love to go to those Halloween parties. I can not remember the last party I attended or even what I wore. I gave a house party years ago and was a cat- wore a leotard and black stockings and drew whiskers on my face. Of course I was thinner with good legs. Are you going to a Halloween party? If so what are you wearing? If you could go to a party, what would you be? What is your favourite Halloween memory?

OBSERVE THE SIGNS

We all have many signs in our lives that we need to pay attention to them all. Health wise- we may have signs things are wrong. Not sleeping well, palpitations too often, change in bodily functions. Our out of control credit card spending- when it is not Christmas! People avoiding us at work- is there something wrong with this picture! Especially when there is restructuring and there may be layoffs! Have you ever been in a position that you notice signs in your life that something is coming? Sometimes superstitious people may say it is a sign! Some cultures and even in Cape Breton believe if a bird poops on your head it is a sign of good fortune! Do you believe in signs that point the way in your life? Or are you too pragmatic? When we drive we must follow the signs, but in daily living what do you think? Halloween is around the corner, are the signs of the season playing with us?

A GRIEF OBSERVED

Is the title of a book by C. S. Lewis. It is a classic book on the journey of grief. Lewis as we know was the author of many books such as the Narnia Chronicles-The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. His marriage and love of his life- his wife Joy died and created a huge gap in his whole being. His book on his journey after her death has been quoted in every modern grief books. He really said it all. His book opens with the following quotation," No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing. At other times it feels like being mildly drunk, or concussed. There is a sort of invisible blanket between the world and me. I find it hard to take it in." Of course he is describing the somatic reactions of grief from his core. His book has been used often by me and I think I have given away several copies of it to various people in my career. I recommend it as it is an easy read and says it all about grief. When someone you love dies, there is lots of advice and many books written on the subject and grief work needing to be done- I have several on my shelves. What to do, how to think, what not to do etc. But Lewis just talks about his painful journey of losing his beloved wife that stands the test of time. Grief is such a painful process for us all. Have you read Lewis' book in a time of need? If you are grieving, I recommend it? Have you used another resource that has helped with your personal journey?

A WOMAN'S VOTE

Yesterday was the municipal election in Ontario. As a woman going to vote, it was time to remember the Suffragettes who fought for the vote in 1917- less than one hundred years ago in our Nation. Women have come a long way but there are still inequalities in our world. I have always encouraged my daughters to vote to honour those who helped us secure this franchise and to have a say in our government. Here's to men who honour their women and women who honour their men. How do you feel about voting? Do you make an effort to practice your right?

REUNIONS-TIME TO RECONNECT

From time to time we all attend a reunion of some kind.There's the school reunion where we venture to see how everyone else is doing and come away just glad to see people are still around. A funeral is a sad reunion-gathered together because of one common denominator.Weddings are happy occasions that often bring family and friends from all over the country and sometimes the world. A retirement party is a reunion- some retirees come and the current colleagues say good-bye. Family reunions can be one named based like genealogical reunions or a mult-generational gathering of the clan in your own family. I attended a reunion of sorts today- a group of us from High School have done a lunch once or twice a year for several years. It has been two years since the last one. We chat and update- who has a new grandchild, who is retiring, whose child was married and just how is everyone doing- nice to see each other, took a couple of pictures and promised to do it again. Have you had a recent reunion with someone or a group of people? Do you like reunions or do you avoid them like a plague? Are you happy like I am knowing people are going strong? Are there people from the Spring of your Life?

MORE FALL THOUGHTS

The trees start to be a contrast between green and orange, yellow, red. Before long the only green left are the coniferous trees.
Nature connects to our souls.

As the trees continue to be ablaze with colours, many are starting to shed their leaves and the spaces between them are increasing. Before the start of the dull brown, there is almost a need to see as much of the countryside as possible. It is that last hurrah before the snow flies.

BABIES LOVE SOCIAL INTERACTIONS

Spending any time with little babies, one realizes what social interactions mean to them. All the toys and mobiles provided are not as meaningful as talking and smiling with a baby. The baby will respond by copying your facial expressions. There are some that say start flash cards so the child will learn to read early. Emotional and social development are more important. Early child psychologists like Piaget and Erikson considered these aspects as paramount. The baby learns to trust the world by being fed, held, touched, kept comfortable and knows his/her cry will be answered. Smiling and cooing helps keep us engaged. A happy baby is so easy to see. Do you have a baby in your world? Are you a new parent? Always lots of advice, eh! Listen to the cries and how your baby responds to the world. Each baby has similar developmental stages but responds in a unique way. My world includes a new baby boy, now two months old. To observe and participate in his world helps me revisit all the concepts of early childhood. Besides what a joy to have him in my life!

THE MAPLE LEAF

This time of year brings out the glory of the colours in our trees. It is such a beautiful time to drive and find a single tree or small woodlots with trees in radiant colours. Children like to collect the leaves and schools often make projects about fall and the leaves. One tree that is so indicative of this adventure is the Maple Tree.
A book written by Daniel Tignes- Canadian Forest Trees Essences gives much detail on all the trees in our country. For now I would like to reflect on the one leaf.

The Maple Leaf is such a Canadian symbol. After a little research to determine that I knew all the varieties of Maple trees in Canada, I discovered there are 129 species in the world. I always thought it was just a Canadian and North America tree. Several species actually grow in Canada- Red Maple, Mountain Maple, Manitoba Maple, Silver Maple, Big Leaf Maple, Douglas Maple and of course the Sugar Maple. As a deciduous tree the Maple sheds its leaves in the fall and renews in the Spring. The Red Maple on our flag is recognized around the world. Maple syrup from the sap of the Sugar Maple was adapted from the Native population by the white man and is a major industry now in Eastern Canada and the US. Pancakes always taste better with some Maple syrup on them. Of course the Toronto Maple Leafs- my local team- who eventually will win another Stanley Cup and hopefully in my lifetime uses the leaf motif. Every Canadian Traveller will have a little maple leaf somewhere on their person to let the world know we are Canadian. But I wonder when the Maple Leaf started to become such a symbol for us? When there was the debate to create a new flag in 1965 and the winner was the flag we have today, the red maple was a popular choice. Our Olympic atheletes proudly display it. Canada Day has them in abundance. Gardeners like to plant a Maple Tree and of course suffer the consequences of raking copious leaves in the Fall. It would be hard to imagine Canada without a Maple Leaf. If we decided to create another symbol, could you imagine what it could be? I can not. For now, I would love to sing that childhood song, rarely heard today- The Maple Leaf Forever!

THE CHANGING SEASON

Summer is far behind now as Fall is in full force. Debating what jacket to wear- the light one or the one with more lining. I have succumbed to gloves as my hands have been cold. Little windy today but not ready to wear a hat. I like the crunching of walking on fall leaves and have always enjoyed the colours. It is such a pretty time with the changing trees. I love summer but do not mind the Fall markets, the leaves, the chance to put the garden to rest so there will just be indoor work and like others have said a chance to give more time to hobbies, writing and planning for the festive season.Then all of a sudden the brown- dull sets in until snow freshens everything. As Canadians, we are an adaptable people. From stifling heat to frigid cold, we just keep on going and make the seasons work. I have been driving on weekends and will post some of my country road pictures. Just felt reflective as I rather enjoyed my brisk walks to and from work today. Do you like the Fall? What do you like? Some people say they like it more than summer-preferring cooler temperatures. Do the changes of the seasons help with changes in your life?