DENIAL-THAT HELPFUL LITTLE DEFENSE MECHANISM

In therapy, it is the responsibility of the therapist to help the client move forward and process issues and to help identify avoidances. However, removing a protective defense mechanism must be at an important time in the therapeutic process.The client can be lead to its identification but the therapist does not remove it. Sometimes it is just left alone. So denial! In the real world, it is all around us. Often it helps us through difficult times. We usually recognize it in others. Harder to recognize it in ourselves. For many denial is not the defense mechanism of choice. I believe mine is intellectualization! Back to denial! In many situations, such as family conflict, different family members can be at different stages of the process. Since it is a crisis, sometimes the best emerges but often the worst emerges. There can be name calling and put downs from very interesting directions. If one family member gets it, but another really wants to deny the crisis, there is little that can be done. Family member, not a therapist! If the younger child gets it, but the older child does not, then the situation can become difficult. " I am older, I know more." Even if all the children are middle age! There is no reasoning! Denial is so protective. So what can be done! For me, I stop talking, I stop trying to present reason and I do what needs to be done quietly and efficiently so when the next step in the process occurs I am already there. My little saying- what will be, will be! However, for me, from a very young age, I was very perceptive and saw what needed to be done. Perhaps, that is why I chose Social Work-Counselling. I can't fix a car engine nor be a finacial analyst! But if you need some facilitation through a difficult process- well I am there! What do you think about denial? Do you think you use it through tough times? Can you identify your own personal defense mechanism? Do you really believe we all have them? Or do you think self examination is a waste of time? My profession is one that many have put down! Even from some people in my own family! In a crisis it would be so helpful for respect from all directions. Alas, everyone retreats to their own way of doing things- even if it is hurtful to other family members. Denial? Why do you feel that way? You are just too sensitive! You are taking things too personally! Denial? Rears itself and protects! Are you denying anything today?