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Inspiration for this blog came from my cousin Roy. His daily reflections of the events in his life have been thoughtful and interesting. Family, friends, colleagues are welcome to read my blog.



Wednesday, August 17, 2011

NANA SAYS A CHILD'S INDEPENDENCE COMES AT MANY STAGES

"Let me do it!" " I can do it!" Statements that children of all ages tell us. The defiant two year old! The five year old that wants to help with dusting! The ten year old that wants to bake a cake or mow the grass alone! The fifteen year old that does not want a ride home from a friend's house! There is always a push-pull between safety and allowing our children and grandchildren to do an activity by themselves. As adults we often see the safety consequences much clearer than a child. However, there are unnecessary risk taking adults that may actually teach bad habits to children. Sometimes, we can discourage children by saying " don't be a sissy!" All of us have our own definition of independence. There are times children need to be dependent on us. When a child is about to learn a new skill or enter a new stage, there may be some temporary regression before the surge forward. As the adult in the situation we must be aware of the child's needs. Support, encouragement, love are the key ingredients as well as setting some clear boundaries! What is your definition of independence? Dependence? Do you struggle with safe boundaries? What has worked for you?

1 comment:

  1. The greatest gifts you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence(Denis Waitley). Note that this not an either/or thing. You must give them both. Sometimes, it takes them many years to get the two things in balance.

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