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Inspiration for this blog came from my cousin Roy. His daily reflections of the events in his life have been thoughtful and interesting. Family, friends, colleagues are welcome to read my blog.



Wednesday, January 30, 2013

NANA SAYS THE PROBLEM IS THE PROBLEM

Not the child. In my work, I like to use some of the concepts of Narrative Therapy. Making the problem the problem and not the child, the self-esteem of your child can be maintained. Approaching concerns with your children, your family, your relationship can be more positive if this simple approach is used. We all do many things well-even the child you are trying to discipline. For example, if your teen is coming home after curfew, coming home late is the problem. Your teen has not become a bad person. Sitting and picking apart the problem allows for the child to help with identifying the problem, analysing it and looking towards a solution. Another example, a mess after a play time. The problem- the mess. How is everyone going to help with solving the mess? In our work we are asked to solve problems. Rarely would we head straight for a solution without identifying the problem. Use it in child rearing! Remember to concentrate on the good areas of your life! Letting your child become part of the "team" in helping to solve the "problem" changes the focus, doesn't it!

2 comments:

  1. “Never let a problem to be solved become more important than the person to be loved” ... Barbara Johnson

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  2. Wise words by another Barbara! Yes loving the child is essential.

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