NANA SAYS SUPPORT YOUNGER MOTHERS

It never ceases to amaze me that the old concepts and conversations continue to happen. Women continue to be judged as mothers by how clean their house may be. Housekeeping and mothering are not the same. If anything I become very concerned if the house becomes more of a priority than spending time and love with children. I had a case years ago where the mother was more concerned her teenage daughter who was having difficulties at school did not keep the taps shined and polished in the bathroom. "It's my house and the children will do things my way!" Yes cleanliness and being organized are good qualities. Garbage out, healthy food, activity etc. If art is being done for example, things can get messy. So! Have an area in the home where such activities can occur and shut the door. Many young couples use the basement as a playground and playroom! Have areas that must stay neat! But to judge a mother by how clean or polished the home looks does not make sense. Fathers are not judged for how neat the lawn has been cut if they are doing the job. Lots of busy working couples use landscaping services anyway.  Let's get back to being judged. Why are some women other women's worst enemies? Perhaps being an older woman and someone who has done the journey, stop judging and start supporting younger mothers! Simple, isn't it?

BEATING THE STORM IN LIFE

While having dinner, I was watching dark clouds to the west come closer. Wanting to plant some vegetables plants and seeds in the garden, I quickly ate so I could get to the garden. Quickly digging some rows and putting in the seeds. Then digging the soil in the garden bins, the plants were placed. Done in the nick of time before the rain started. It made me reflect about the warnings we get in life. Our health! Our finances! Connecting with people! For example, visiting a sick person in the hospital. Helping out the kids with the grandchildren! We all have little or big storms in our lives. Getting the tasks done to manage those storms take tenacity! Sometimes courage! But it is also important to take care of everything. A little insect repellent before getting to the garden would have helped with the mosquito bites on my butt! Thank goodness for after bite to stop the itching!!!

#36 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- 150 STUFF

It's everywhere and more is coming. Love the 150 stuff! The motif is on so many things. A little bunch of stuff from Loblaws/PC brand. I bought some things from Hudson's Bay too but waiting to give to the kids for July 1. Maybe there will be another post as the pile grows! How about you? Are you into the 150? Are you buying or giving some items to others? Everything is functional. I have two new beach towels to use.

COPING WITH CHRONIC ILLNESS AS A CAREGIVER- SOME STRATEGIES

Life catches up with all of us. As we age, health changes. so often there are chronic issues with one or both partners, children, grandparents or friends. Watching some one's health change and trying to support without taking charge is a fine line to walk. Some strategies.

1. The person owns the illness. What are the wishes? Plans as it progresses?

2. Keep records of vitals, medication, doctor visits, an updated medical record.

3.As a family member, hard not to become a caregiver. So if the demands are all consuming, get some help from family, friends, the church, your club or if financially okay pay someone.

4. Do not accept the blame for any illness. Especially wives are often blamed for their spouse's health concerns. For example, why did you let him Smoke?

5. Consulting with professionals. Counselling, equipment needs, government services and programs are a few areas that may be useful. For example, if the person has Alzheimer's use your local Alzheimer's Society for any support. Social Workers are a great source of knowledge and emotional support.

6. Less is more. Try to get out with the loved one. Short walks or wheelchair rolls. Go to a restaurant for an occasional meal. Visit places for short visits. Have a vehicle that can be accessed. If not and the person qualifies get accepted to your local Mobility Bus service.

7. Don't become totally housebound. But if the demands are such, make the home as enriching as possible. Good cable stations, skype, movie channels like Netflix so entertainment is stimulating, newspaper delivery. Online shopping is a must.

8. Take care of your own health and needs. Time away from the loved one is vital. If the person were not sick, independent activities would occur, so let them happen.

9. Use a medic alert so when going out there is the reassurance that connection occurs. If the person is still able to use a cell phone than it is carried at all times.

10. Day programs, groups, clubs that meet regularly may be considerations.

11. Breathe, live, enjoy some quality time with your loved one. Read to the person, watch a movie together, encourage other family members to make regular short visits.

#chronicillness#professionals#medicalrecords#homesafety#governmentservices

PINK SPRING IN CANADA

Trees and bushes have so many colours in May. But pink is a popular one.

Favourite tulips!

Walk around your neighbourhood!

Rows of trees- pink!

Our favourite park with those beautiful trees lining the edges.

The trees lined Yonge Street too!

Even a beautiful bush on the street.

                   The tulips by the Library with its pink building are always lovely!
#Canada#tulips#pink#springflowers

KEEP YOUR CHIN AND KEEP GOING

One's posture can demonstrate mood. Depressed people often slouch, look at their feet and well look despondent. The old saying to keep your chin up may work and help with life. Breathing is better which helps with mood. Good posture helps with appearance. Psychologically finding personal strategies helps with one's sense of control in life. So Keep Your Chin Up! It also helps with safety, your eyes can view the dangers in life.
#positive thinking#depession#psychology

CLEAN YOUR CLOSET AND FIND SOME TREASURES

We all have way too many clothes! So cleaning and sorting items in a closet between seasons can bring awareness to all the items there. Lately I rediscovered a lovely red Canadian hoodie that can be used for the 150 as well as cooler casual Spring days. Nice with my blue jeans. It was at the back of the closet.  Giving away or selling clothes not worn often can make room. So before new purchases are made decide if there are enough clothes. Probably the answer is yes. There is a psychological lift to sorting items in one's life. It gives some sense of order and control. We all have clothes that remind us of other times. Parents keep little baby outfits too long. My children did not want their baby stuff. A few items but not much. I am still hoping one of them will want the kilts. So get to the closets in the house and purge a little or recycle some items to use in your life today. For me, my Canada hoodie fits in with this year's 150 theme.
#closet#Canadian#Canada#redhoodie#150

NANA SAYS GET READY FOR THE BUSY END OF THE SCHOOL YEAR

As May winds down, the end of school is in sight. Lots to plan for the summer if camps and activities have not been organized already. Keeping children focused for school can be challenging. Clothes are an issue as the warm and cool days make for interesting combinations. Kids want to wear shorts even if it is cooler. Then of course the Spring bugs. Ticks are an issue so how to stay safe through the next months. And the regular mosquitoes and black flies! So with the fun and longer days come those areas of planning. Children want to stay up longer so maybe quiet bed time to read a book. Yes read, take away any electronics close to bedtime. No gadgets in bed. So parents set an example by doing the same. No electronics in your beds too!! So with school concerts, barbecues, sports team banquests, dance recitals and even some June birthdays and anniversaries it can be as busy as Christmas. The good news is summer can be as relaxing as one wants. Lots of lessons and sports or time to slow down! Of course grandparents can take on some duties and little day trips with the kids too.
#schoolyear#planning#ticks#bugs#organization

SPRING THE SEASON FOR ICE CREAM

Trips to your favourite Ice Cream Parlour are in order. Do you know the Dairy Queen here in Richmond Hill has been here since the early 1960s. I used to go with my parents and siblings for an ice cream cone. On Mother's Day, I was treated to a Carmel Funnel Cake delight. Oh Spring, time to indulge. With  all the yard and garden work exhausting some calories, it is okay to have a few extra calories.
#dairyqueen#icecream#spring#icecreamcone#funnelcake

LIFE IS LIKE A PILE OF BRICKS!

We build a life one brick at a time. In process we may feel that nothing is happening until it is observed we have little piles of life. Bricks of memories and accomplishments and family! Sometimes one pile and other times piles that compartmentalize our lives! Each brick represents something!

BARB'S GENEALOGY TIDBITS #5-CHARLES WILLIAM PARKIN-CONSERVATION VISIONARY

                           GENEALOGY CAN REVEAL VISIONARY IDEALS

Ball Point Mariposa Township, Victoria County ( now the City of Kawartha Lakes) has been home to the Parkin/Keeler/Alton family lines for generations. Located on Lake Scugog, it is an area that is well known for its vegetation, wild life and fish as part of the Trent-Severn Waterway System.

On or about 1840 Robert Parkin(s) and his wife Hannah Keeler lived on this little cape on Lake Scugog.

Robert Parkin(s) was born in Derby County England coming to Canada about 1840. Hannah's family originated from Norfolk County, England first landing in Eastern Ontario before relocating to Brock Township, Durham County. The Keeler family lived in Manilla which borders both counties of Durham and Victoria.Counties.

Robert and Hannah married in Canada.

Robert and Hannah are found in the 1871 Canadian census along with their children: Sarah Elizabeth, Amelia, Robert 

Thomas, Hannah, Rebbecca, Charles William, Martha and John Keeler.

As was customary in many families sons inherited land. Robert Thomas, John Keeler, and Charles William each inherited the land from their father each obtaining a third of the Ball Point Peninsula. The daughters married local men. Name like Starr, Gilson, Wakeford and Thompson are well known in the area. Starr Bay was named after the Starr family.

The Keeler family continued to live in the area as well.

So how did these two family lines contribute to the Kawarthan area. I would like to concentrate on Charles William Parkin(s).

In the Games and Fisheries Department of Ontario, Charles William worked as a games warden or was known in the early 1900s an Overseer for the Valentia territory which included Mariposa and Ops townships.

Obtaining photocopies of his reports to the Legislative Assembly of Ontario by my brother Ronald, gave insight to the man and his vision of protecting the great outdoors to be enjoyed by many.

He needed to record the vegetation and the animal life as well as try to sell licenses to fishermen and hunters. He was not very good at sells as his revenue was much lower than others in the province as well as Victoria and Haliburton Counties. The family believes he did not want the area over hunted. He was particularly concerned about the muskrat population.

It would be difficult to quote all the gems found in his reports transcribed by the department. However, a small gleaming is warranted.

1908: " He thinks fishing through the ice should be prohibited, as when a man cuts a hole through the ice over a bass bed, he can fish away until he has taken every bass feeding near. He is of the opinion that if the close season as from December 15th to June 15th and the laws strictly enforced, in a few years fish would again be rally plentiful there." That year he was happy there were more inspectors on the lake.

1909: He again advocated to limit winter fishing. He heard from people who lived there that over 600 fish were taken from the lake by two local residents. He believed every fisherman should to carry a permit. he continued to try to protect the muskrat population noting in 1910 they were more plentiful. Even the mink was making a comeback along with more partridges and ducks. The government boat Naiad patrolling the lake helped all the local overseers.

1911: He continued to note the decline in bass as due to the winter ice fishing. He was concerned about the frogs. " In regard to the catching of frogs for domestic purposes, he would suggest that the close season be extended for at least three years. Owing to the demand to supply the market, they are becoming almost extinct." He also wanted the meadow lark on the game list.

1912: He noted the muskellunge- which probably mean muskies- and bass were scarce due to a severe winter season. A new cement dam at Lindsay was constructed so he worried about no proper fish-way was in the dam to allow the fish to come up stream to Lake Scugog to spawn. Muskrats, mink, partridges and cotton-tail rabbits increased in numbers. However, he received complaints form farmers about too many rabbits. Wanting to make the playing field even he wanted the pump gun demolished as was the automatic gun.

His reports until 1915 continued to reflect his concerns and awareness of his territory. He really wanted all trappers to be licensed to protect the muskrats.

He was an avid outdoors man. He respected the rules of not taking more than his share of any game.

Married to Elizabeth Ann Frost (born Athens, Leeds and Grenville County) in 1890, he loved his wife and one surviving child. Unfortunately they lost a baby boy at 4 months old. Living out most of his life in and around Mariposa he worked not only as an Overseer but did farm on the land. His brothers operated farms and passed on the land to their families. In the early 1970 those farms existed until being sold and becoming the modern day subdivision found on Ball Point Road.

Charles moved to Toronto in his old age to be closer to family due to health issues where he died in 1941. The little lakeside cemetery by the Swain farm is his final resting place.

His insight and love of nature trying to protect the natural resources of the area can be current goals of many people too. His vision of conservation continues in the family as generations are heeding his concerns. The City of Kawartha Lakes remains a haven for the hunter and fisherman. Ball Point cottage is still enjoyed by family members for recreational purposes.

Resources

1. 1871 Census of Ontario. Mariposa Township, Victoria County.

2. Marriage Certificate-006969. Ontario Vital Statistics.

3. Ontario department of Fish and Game Annual Reports to the Legislative Assembly of Ontario- 1908, 1909, 1910, 1911, 1912, 1913, 1914, 1915. Excerpts of the pages with Charles William Parkin's reports.

4. Parkin family history- unpublished.

5. Keeler family history- unpublished.

Written by Barbara Di Mambro

Copyright 2017

#trentsevernwaterway#lakescugog#fish#muskrat#Keeler#Parkin#Frost#familyhistory

#35 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- THE 150 CANADIAN TULIP

Available through Home Hardware in the Fall, I planted over 30 tulip bulbs for the 150. I gave 10 bulbs each to my daughters to plant in their gardens.

Located in several spots in the garden, I watched and waited for the tulip to bloom. The greenery even has some white on it.

Finally one tulip opened. Much later than others in the garden.

It looks like a maple leaf. Even could be mistaken for the flag. A neat idea of some horticulturarist!

A wonderful little group of them. There are several spots in the garden and a couple of planters with these anniversary Tulips.
Do you want to know something funny? Some of these bulbs in people's gardens have been blooming orange! Even some of the ones in Ottawa. So I was very pleased when mine were red and white. Although some have a little yellow to them. Oh well, Happy 150! Do you have some of these bulbs in your garden? Pretty additions to the others, eh!

#34 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- HOCKEY

As the Stanley Cup finals are winding down with ust 4 teams left, it would not be very Canadian to avoid our obsession with hockey. Little kids learn to skate and shortly afterwards join hockey teams. More for boys than girls but today girls are joining the sport in droves. Olympics, Junior Worlds and many other tournaments have been played in honour of the sport we invented and then the world joined. With grandsons, they too are playing on hockey teams and loving the sport. For me, I would love one year for the Toronto Maple Leafs to bring the cup back to our city.

#33 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- CANADA'S TERRY FOX

Known for his courage and tenacity. Only 21 when after losing a leg to cancer, Terry wanted to run across Canada to raise money for cancer research. Starting in Newfoundland April 12, 1980 he began his journey across the country only to stop in Thunder Bay. He was diagnosed with another cancer. He died June 28, 1981 at age 22.

Since his death, marathons, donations  and September Terry Fox days have raised more than $700 million for cancer research.The Fox family has always been involved in Terry's dream and carried on with his legacy. 150 celebrations would not be complete without Terry Fox's contribution to our country.

MOTHER'S DAY-WHAT DOES IT REALLY MEAN

Every day is Mother's Day. Mothers work and do for their children, husbands and extended families. Sometimes they even walk the dog! Running and doing!Kissing "boobos" to make it better is on the list. Babies are carried inside for 40 weeks more or less. Birthing and feeding and letting our bodies heal take its toll. Some bladders never recover completely! It is a day to honour our mothers or to feel proud as a mother. It can be happy, sad, mad and glad. Happy to be here. Sad to be missing the mother lost. Mad to have to do the dishes! Glad to be alive! To all the mothers, aunts, those who have lost a mother, those who want to be a mother and all who love all the mothers in their lives. We are all earth mothers! Have a Happy Mother's Day!

#32 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- CANADA'S WALK OF FAME

On a sidewalk along King Street in Toronto in the Entertainment District is the Walk of Fame. Edwin Mirvish, an amazing Canadian that brought entertainment to Toronto and Canada is honoured outside the Royal Alexander Theatre. Initiated in July 1996, every year Canadians are chosen to have their name on a slab on the sidewalk. I walked along King Street as a Mother's Day present and snapped photos of my favourite Canadians. So many! Look for other slabs as I honour them this 150 Anniversary celebration!
#walkof fame#toronto#entertainmentdistrict

#31 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- THE TULIP FESTIVAL IN OTTAWA

Starting today and running for 2 weeks the Tulip Festival starts in Ottawa. Millions of bulbs are donated each year from the Netherlands as a thank you to Canada for keeping their Royal Family during World War Two. So to celebrate our 150, we have a Dutch royal visitor in Ottawa today.

NANA SAYS USE ME- I AM HERE NOW

Recently my children were worried about me babysitting five of my six grandchildren. Basically, I responded use me, I am here now. I have the energy now and the health. now. The children are small enough that they want to be with their grandparents. Time will turn things around. Besides grandchildren will grow up and grow away, the natural progression of life. So I am here now. To babysit. To be a listening ear. To write the family stories. Of course as the children age, they can be helpers for Nana and Granpa. They can run and get things. They can be responsible for their activities of daily living. So the workload is evenly divided. One daughter even mentioned the boys could help dig in the garden. Hum! Little shovels and gloves may be on the shopping list! So I am here  now to be the Nana I want to be!

HAVE TULIPS-THANK THE DUTCH

On my Bucket list is a trip to the Netherlands when the fields of Spring Bulbs are blooming. Meanwhile, enjoying the Spring locally with all the varieties popping their heads in the garden.

Over the years I have taken so many photos of tulips, I could fill a book.

Of course that wonderful trip to the Tulip Festival in Ottawa-2011!

Tulip art!

So this May the Queen of the Netherlands is visiting our country for our 150th. You do know the history. Yes she was born in safety in Ottawa during World War Two. In return, the Dutch donate copious amounts of bulbs to our country. So Thank the Dutch!

#tulips#spring#dutch#tulipfestival

LIFE IS LIKE A NEW PATH TO SOMEWHERE!

Where does your path take you? Will there be shadows? Will there be sunshine? Life takes us down different paths. Sometimes the same one can bring new events! Sometimes a new one to bring the same old events! Life means taking chances. Getting started on the path. Being adventuresome! Hopefully the path will lead back home to its comforts!

TAKE PHOTOS-SHARE THE PICTURES

Anyone that knows me knows I love to take pictures. Some okay! Some amazing! Some just ordinary! What everyone knows is I love to share and give copies of pictures. Yes in this day and age when everyone keeps their pictures digital and rarely print, well I print many photos and share with those in them. Beware of the cloud or whatever used! They could disappear. So don't keep all your eggs in one basket. Of course my children get lots because they are in them. And my wonderful 6 are in them alot too! So over the last few years I have also gone through my albums and still doing it to send photos to people from the albums. For example, I shared and sent photos to my wonderful cousin Roy of his earlier childhood a few Chirstmases ago. My niece Kathryn turned 50 so posted some earlier pics of her and will be sending the originals to her.She can share them with her children. Another niece received lots of photos one Christmas of some earlier pics of her. Her parents divorced so she probably did not have them. On my husband's side, his two nieces of divorced parents too received an album one Christmas of all their pictures with their Nonna and us. Their mother would would have only ripped up any pictures in their childhood with her so I waited until they were old enough to be able to make their own decisions about any picture. My facebook groups have benefitted from photos and even postcards! The response has been heartwarming!  My girls do not want pictures of everyone in the albums perhaps one or two so giving to the people helps me weed my albums and so to speak downsize the albums, Trust me I have shelves of albums so it helps to find new homes for pictures.  I have discovered in life that sharing photos with others brings joy! At our Amici Club, I had some photos from two events and had several copies to share with the ladies. Taking the pictures is one thing then sending them to the universe is another or not quite the universe, I exaggerate but to the friendship circles! I have been the recipient of pictures. My Dad shared his photos of him and my Mom before the separation and divorce. So many pictures of my beautiful Mom in her early days. Love them. So take photos but chose to share.

WATER EVERYWHERE-KEEP YOUR HEAD ABOVE WATER

Spring can bring flooding in many parts of Canada. This year with the amount of rainfall in Ontario, Quebec and the Maritimes, it is flooding in many places. The GTA has received more rain in a few days which is the normal average for all of May. The Toronto Islands are flooded with a ferry on standby in case the residents need shelter. The Don Valley Parkway with the raging Don River is at risk of closure. East of Toronto in the Bowmanville, sand bagging is occurring to try to fend off Lake Ontario. Suburbs of Ottawa are facing flooding. The Gatineau in
Quebec as well as the islands south of Montreal. Water everywhere. I even had some areas of my basement with some problems. It will be fixed in the next week or so with stone and eaves trough fixing happening.  The good news is the rain promised for today Saturday has held off! So a piece of advice- just keep your head above water!

#30 BARB'S REFLECTIVE 150- CANADA IN THE SPRING TIME

There are so many beautiful regions in Canada that burst with trees full of spring blossoms. Those blossoms can become the fruit so many enjoy!Nova Scotia-Annopolis Valley, parts of Quebec of course with the Maple Trees and maple syrup, Ontario especially the Niagara region and british Columbia's Okanagan Valley with fruit and of course the wine industry! Everywhere in between there are blossoms emeging.

                                     Of course pink is a good colour to see.

NANA SAYS PARENTS NEED THEIR OWN SPACE.

Becoming a parent does not mean your own identity needs to go. Of course there are some wealthier individuals that rarely see their children- nannies, boarding school, and other staff do the job. I am talking about average parents with demands of home, work and family. Keeping interests like exercise routines, reading, night courses or evenings out or even just couple vacations are paramount to keeping sane. On limited budgets it can be a challenge. Thus the car pools where other parents share with team activities and drives. Sometimes at home one parent has an activity while the other parent parents then switch the roles. The extended family helps with sleepovers at grandparents, aunts&uncles and even family friends. Giving a break helps the parent from breaking. Children's demands ebb and flow with age. Little ones need constant supervision. But older children tucked away in rooms on gadgets can bring another set of problems so a different supervision is needed. Being responsible for other people takes it toll on the mind, body and soul. All children bring some challenges so one never knows what might present itself on any given day. So trying every day to find "some space " is paramount. For me, it was rising an hour earlier than the girls. That simple quiet time in the morning was a luxury! Then some sleepovers on a Saturday night sure helped with couple time! Start small and manageable but find your space. Your children will thank you!

WHAT IS CRITICAL THINKING?DO YOU HAVE IT?

In Health Care, nurses are asked to have critical thinking about their patients. Social Workers/Therapists/Counsellors do assessment and analyze the issues to facilitate change and problem solving. Financial Analysts are supposed to think critically too. But do we all really have it. It means to see something different in the obvious. To question the norm! Not to think outside the box because that expression is so cliche or passe or whatever! Critical thinking does save lives. Deciding not to drive in a snow storm, for example, would probably save your life! Complacency makes us stop to think critically. We think we know it all! So if a younger subordinate questions something, it can be annoying to the expert. However younger eyes and ears on a matter may make the difference! The same goes for the younger person listening to the older person. Experience counts for a lot and how much critical thinking has already occurred in that life! It is important however not to overthink every decision as nothing will get done! Taking a chance and doing is important too! So do you have it? Do you use critical thinking in your day, week, life? Does your job entail some critical thinking? What are your thoughts?

MAY BEGINS WITH THE RAIN

Pelting rain off and on all night. Surprised the street is not flooded. I thought that April rain brings May Spring flowers. It can stop any time soon. A little drizzle is okay but the pounding on the skylight was unnerving. So May my favourite month is here. I want to embrace it with Spring activities. Getting outside with fresh air. My table and chairs are on the back porch for outdoor meals and a favourite activity of reading! Adding new knowledge or revisiting old knowledge brings depth to life. To spend some time with my daughters and families will be good time. For Mother's Day weekend, will do separate activities with each daughter to have some quality Mother-Daughter time! Looking forward to it. Planning a staycation to get some minor home renos done. Of course to celebrate an anniversary is always fun. Something simple as it is not a special one! May with the emerging greenery and flowers popping up everywhere in the garden. Love it! Just hope it does not pass too quickly! Have about you? What does May bring in your life?