NANA SAYS HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH A DEATH TAKES SENSITIVITY

Helping children deal with the death of a loved one is often tough for adults. Depending on the age of the child, there is a different understanding of what death means. Not like the cartoons with the person suffering severe injuries and jumping up and being well. Losing a grandparent can be tough. How do the adults in the child's life help the child to remember the loved one? Sometimes it is as simple as letting the child talk about their feelings and their thoughts about the grandparent. At special events such as Christmas, for example, a little picture ornament with the grandparent's picture can be very inclusive. Occasional cemetery visits can be useful if there is a place to visit bringing the message home that it is okay to remember and miss the person. Adults often have trouble dealing with their own feelings so need to share their difficulty with their children. It is okay to admit it is one of the toughest things to occur in one's life. There are so many books and workbooks to help children deal with a loss. Check out your library or bookstore. Funeral homes believe it or not have wonderful brochures on various themes and dealing with the losses. There is no right answer as each child is different in a family and may need a different approach. It is important to take your time and try not to have set answers. Missing loved ones will always have some place in a family network. Being patient and sensitive is what good parenting is all about!