WHAT DOES YOUR HUSBAND DO?

Can sound like an innocent question to married women. It can also be loaded with sexual politics.

The old adage- men can marry down but women should marry up. If you are a wealthy old man, ditch the old woman and get yourself a young trophy wife. Successful women can still be judged by what the husband does for a living. Very rarely have I heard in the workplace a man asked what his wife does for a living especially when the man is very successful. Women have come a long way in terms of equality in the workplace. But we continue to be our own worst enemy when it comes to categorizing how important someone may be. For example, if you are a nurse and your husband is a nurse carries a different weight to some than if you are a nurse and your husband is a doctor! Why is this? Heaven forbid if you decide to be a househusband and your wife supports the family monetarily! Women who are homemakers also are put in various categories depending on the spouse's occupation. If you stay at home to care for your children, you must have a nanny to have more importance. It determines how important your spouse may be. In 2011, why do these outdated judgements exist? It made sense in primitive times when you needed a strong hunter for survival of the fittest. Single women supporting themselves and their children should be put on pedestals instead of a pity party! It takes great strength to carry the load! Often without knowing personal situations, married women can be told " well you don't have to worry about money, your husband is working!" Many women carry the benefit package for those self-employed spouses. The truth is men with confidence do not worry if the wife makes more money- they can enjoy the benefits. A couple and not societal prejudices should prevail. I personally have never liked this question. Having studied psychology and sociology in my undergraduate years, I became attuned at a young age of gender issues and prejudices. For women to become truly confident of their own abilities and personal view of what is successful, we must stop judging- period! We should admit to ourselves when we are jealous of another woman and not try to judge or pigeonhole the person by what her husband does! I feel honoured to work with successful women. Now at my age, younger women are my bosses!! The cashier at the supermarket may be carrying the load for her family; the lady at the Cleaner's may own the store; many women have put their spouses through school. In my case, my husband worked while I finished my Masters- he put me through school! Sexual politics will never go away. The burden can be lessened and I believe it starts with the female gender. What do you think? Do you encounter sexual sterotyping in your workplace? Do you care if someone asks what your wife does?