NOVEMBER COMES TO AN END AND THE FUN OF THE CHRISTMAS SEASON BEGINS-BEING OPTIMISTIC WITH ADVERSITY

 November with birthdays, Remembrance Day and some personal dilemmas.

I have had a disturbing issue with my mail. Somehow it has been rerouted!

Canada Post is trying to find the issue. Parcels get delivered to my door, just not mail to my community mailbox. Lots of flyers.

Hopefully I will get some Christmas cards.

I have put many items online now with online accounts.

So as November ends I hope December brings a resolution to the problem,

I remain optimistic. However there is an Ombudsman at Canada Post I can use if necessary.

In life when some heavy shit has happened, I know I can get through the small stuff.

But it is strange that small stuff takes so much emotional energy. 

Why do we feel because we are older that crap should not come our way?

I remember feeling that about my mother-in-law. She had dealt with so much and even as she was dying from cancer she had crap thrown at her by a family member. It did not seem fair.

Then yes we all know life is not always fair. But somehow I feel it should be.

I remember another stressful time. October 1984. My husband had a business partner, wife and son killed in a car accident on the 401 Thanksgiving weekend coming home from Montreal. One worker was beaten up and in bad shape in the hospital. Adolph had a truck fire on the road that completely gutted it. He had told me Barb I had a little truck fire. When I saw the truck in the yard, I was shocked.

Adolph had to go to Montreal for the funeral as his partner had family there.

Then what happened. A community Board to which I belonged had a 50/50 draw. I was called that week to be told I had won. The money was quickly used to book a trip to Mexico in January- a good discount week. I felt Adolph needed a vacation more than anyone.

That is why I remain optimistic. In the middle of diversity there can be a glimmer of hope and goodness.

Bad things do happen but then so do good things happen. 

When we open up to the universe with good vibes- I know it sounds hockey but  it does work.

Some people might label it as FAITH. Call it what you want. But positive energy and ideas can bring positive stuff. Besides it does not hurt anyone. 

With any anxiety I may be feeling I do my positive self talk of what I can do to make life especially my life better. If I feel okay then people around me are taking in my positive energy.

On social media, only positive comments as I do not want to be one of those bitchy trolls that say whatever.

So how about you? How are you doing with November coming to an end? Are you facing any adversity in your life?

#positiveenergy#faith#lifeisnotfair#lookingforgoodintheworld#deathofapartner#gettingthroughroughtimes#tryingtostaypositiveandhappy#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

WARS IN THE WORLD HURTS EVERYONE'S SOULS

 So a truce in the Hamas-Israel war. Yay.

Some hostages back home.

I saw one father in Israel hugging and hugging his child on her return.

I could not imagine having a loved child missing or fearing death.

Ukraine also tears at my soul. We have Ukrainians who have come to my area due to the conflict.

Then all the protests and hate scenarios across Canada.

There really is no place for hate in this country or even in the world.

It is 2023. We survived a pandemic. 

Each of us individually have survived our own personal stuff. And sometimes lots of stuff.

I think the good souls of the world need to continue to pray for peace. And pray very hard.

#soulsneedpeaceintheworld#warshurteveryone#thinkofUkranians#thinkofIsreal#prayforpeaceintheMiddleEast#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

WHEN YOU ARE HAPPY FOR WHAT YOU HAVE AND DO NOT CARE WHAT OTHERS HAVE??

 I was reflecting with a family member about being okay with who I am and what I have.

Okay we live in a very material society.

Things matter.

Your car matters.

Your house matters.

Or does it?

I have been around some very superficial people who feel superior because they have more than I do.

As a working person, sometimes I was looked down on because I worked. That woman had a husband with a higher paying job. For example, it was at one job at CNIB where lots of the volunteer women had downtown executive husbands. Staff were inferior to them. Well I had a nickname for them. Lady Bountifuls! 

For me being able to support myself along with my husband mattered.

I went to university to find a good job and I actually found many good jobs. 

As life would have it, working was important. Paid the bills. Paid into pension plans!

What some people with things and money do not realize is, many people do not give a flying crap about their stuff and fake feeling superiority attitudes!

I like real people with values. Even just ordinary people with ordinary lives are good. I am one of those ordinary people and I am just fine with it. 

I have people that I love and they love me.

Have a laugh.

A good meal.

Go to a movie.

Be kind every day.

Treat others with the respect I want in my life.

Activities with meaning for me not necessary for others. Like my obsession with genealogy!!

Trying to enjoy every day!!

So my 2018 jeep is just fine, thank you very much. My neighbourhood is full of very expensive cars!! 

How about you? What are your thoughts? Are you happy with what you have and the people in your life?

#beinghappyinthismaterialworld#likingwhoyouareandwhatyouhave#reflectivethoughsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

NOVEMBER WITH CHRISTMAS PREPARATIONS AND MUCH MORE

 Decorated the house with big items as all the little stuff stays in the closet.

I only decorated one Christmas tree this year.

I find that decorating has become more work than fun.

So I do less as needed. The house looks festive enough. 

My light display is in the front window so I can put it on a timer. My outside plug does not accommodate one. Sometimes the plug shorts and I need to go to my fuse box to restart it. So inside lights work.

Christmas shopping is slow as I have to wait for the grandchildren's wishes. Now it is usually money!

However I still buy a few small things to have presents under the tree.

The two little ones need that fun of Christmas. 

But the feeling of the empty chair and missing loved ones creeps in!!

I like outdoor Christmas displays. Maybe I need to go out and about to see the joy of the season.

How about you? How are your Christmas plans coming along?

#christmasprepareations#novemberisabusymonth#BuyingforChristmas#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

DOES ANYONE ELSE FEEL VERY SAD ABOUT THE STATE OF THE WORLD AND WHAT IT MEANS FOR OUR GRANDCHILDREN?

 I feel sad.

About Ukraine.

About Israel and the Middle East.

Sad about the anti hate for so many groups right now in North America.

What's the matter with people?

Why is history repeating itself?

I work hard at being caring and accepting and open minded. But not so open minded my brains would fall out.

People that are different than I am are allowed to be. As long as no harm is done to another human being.

Children, old people, the vulnerable are to be protected.

We can have differences in opinion.

We can have different beliefs.

As long as all of those things mean men and women are equal. And others that chose a different gender are equal as well.

Sad brings a sense of hopelessness but I am hopeful.

I am hopeful with action, tolerance, prayer and just supporting the right causes that respect all help in my own small way. 

I find myself listening more to everyone. Watching more than one news channel to get a different perspective. Except Fox. I actually don't get it so no problem. RAI the Italian news for two reasons. To listen to Italian and to see their perspective of it all.

Missing loved ones also makes me very sad. Especially as the Festive season is upon us.

What do you think about it all? The state of the world? The anti everything especially hate of any one group?

#sadaboutthestateoftheworld#tryingtostayhopeful#tryingtobeacceptingandtolerant#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro#equalityforall#makingcanadaabetterplace

REMEMBRANCE DAY REFLECTIONS-RICHMOND HILL 2023

 I missed last year's Remembrance Day Service in Richmond Hill as I was with my grandchildren babysitting.

So taking my camera I parked at the Richmond Hill Library and walked to the Cenataph to get a seat.

The Service is always the same. Same hymns. Same poems. But being a Remembrance Day service that is okay.

I left my camera in my purse. I even did not want to take any photos on my phone.

I had pictures of the military banners on Yonge Street already.

Just a few of the many along the street.

One has more meaning.

Matthew Dinning was from Wingham but his grandparents live in Richmond Hill. Each year they place a wreath in his honour and for those that served in Afghanistan. He was 23.

I saw them after the service and stated always remembering your beautiful grandson. Then I simply said I have grandsons and couldn't imagine. A simple exchange between grandparents. 

Always remembering my family members that all came home from the wars they served for Canada.

So not a day for photos but just quiet reflection.

#remembranceday#quietreflection#alocalhero#grandparentsremembering#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

ARE COMMUNITY GROUPS WORTH THE EFFORT?

 In my bid to stay involved with community groups, I have found them to be less positive.

Cancelled meetings.

Not getting a response to messages sent for suggestions.

Having suggestions over turned by one Chair who likes to micro manage and is a bit of a control freak. Who needs it??

I do not.

I am involved in 4 such meetings and groups.

My online groups like Facebook groups, writing on my blog, Instagram are more fulfilling and yes enjoyable. Enjoyable is a good thing. 

I find attending events without any commitment to be satisfactory. I can take photos and enjoy the event.

Perhaps even meet some new people. Have a lively conversation and then go home.

No hassle. No conflicts. 

So will the New Year bring some resignations from some groups. Perhaps!!

Or less involvement!

I can go to the Library.

I can go to a movie.

I can try to meet with acquaintances and friends more often.

And my family. Still enjoy those grandchildren sleepovers.

I joined the other groups to be with people and meet new people which I have done.

For the power struggles and hassles, I had enough in my career.

I want to support my family with love and involvement. I do not mind their struggles, challenges and yes sometimes conflicts. But because I love those people it is doable and worth it.

In life, pick your battles.

Besides, I really do not need to impress anyone. Really I never did. So if someone does not like what I

 say or do. WHATEVER!!

How about you? Do you belong to groups that are not a happy time? Any suggestions on moving forward?

#nothappywithcommunitygroups#howtoenjoylifebetter#distancingfromtheconflictsofcommunitygroups#friendsandfamilybringsatisfactiona#beingwithothersforagoodtime

RAKING LEAVES DOES COUNT AS EXERCISE

 Is it just me or do leaves have a villainous side?

The lawn can be beautifully raked.

Some leaves bagged. Other strewn on the garden for the winter.

The next day more have blown on the yard and more raking is necessary.

When it appears all the leaves have fallen off my trees, surprise!

More were still to come. Or one day when raking the wind was blowing leaves from other yards down the street to mine.

Maple, Oak and sycamore leaves!

The good news is raking leaves does count as exercise.

#rakingleaves#leavesblowingeverywhere#baggingrakedleaves#workinghardatrakingleaves#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambr

POEMS BY BARBARA- THE MIDNIGHT WIND AND WELL ENOUGH

THE MIDNIGHT WIND

Raged in the Early Hours.

Branches bending as they scraped the roof.

Blew the lid off the Rain Barrel

Leaves strewn

Some leaves made neat piles

Easy to gather and bag!

Did it blow away the issues.

The Concerns.

Did it blow some new hope and joy my way?

November 4, 2023

WELL ENOUGH

The rustling of leaves under my feet as if each rustle and leaf contains a memory.

Some days are easier than others.

But Fall seems to be a reminder that its season brings certain melancholy.

Remembering is often joyful

Remembering is often painful.

Remembering is often numb.

No feeling.

The numbness is easier as I do not have to feel.

Sometimes I do not want to feel anything.

Numb is a good thing.

I like going through the motions of being busy.

It takes any pressure off.

To the outside world I am coping.

Surviving.

Living on.

Busy,

As if being busy is so purposeful.

A wonderful external defense.

Oh she looks good.

She looks happy.

Fake it until you make it.

Well faking has become my mantra for living.

Be chatty.

Be polite.

Be nice.

It's okay to be not over it.

It's okay to contain the grief.

It's okay to be not okay.

So rather than I'm okay as an answer to how are you?

Well enough.

Confusing to some.

Others get it.

Well enough!!

November 4, 2023

I have been finding trying to write poems has become an outlet for some reflective thoughts. I am tired of reading experts and influencers and opinionate people trying to tell us all how to do, be, feel and live. I do not want to become one of those people.

So poems by Barbara is another way to challenge myself in this blog.

Enjoy!

#poemsbybarbara#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro#wellenough#midnightwind#fakeituntilyoumakeit#okaynottobeokay#barbaradimambro#poemshelpwithlife'sprocessing

NOVEMBER BRINGS LOTS OF WORK TO BE DONE

 November has two significant birthdays for me.

A daughter.

A granddaughter.

Remembrance day functions. I usually like to go to the Service.

And Christmas preparations. I am behind in my shopping.

The main reason is most of the family just want money.

However I like to buy some small items for the grandchildren anyway.

There are community people and functions I make some gift baskets as prizes.

So to get the party started and shopping for what I need. 

How about you? Is November a busy time or not?

#novemberpreparationforChristmas#shoppingforChristmas#enjoyingfamilybirthdaysandfun#maybemorefamilystuff#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro