IT IS NOT BEING STRONG BUT JUST DOING WHAT REAL LOVE DOES

 Being told I was strong to be there for Adolph and others in my life seems so trite.

When we love someone it is just doing what real love does.

In life those that show up mean more than those that say tell if I can do anything.

So providing loving care is just that. 

What did the love of my life need?

And then doing it.

Also asking him if I could do something else for him.

I believe always in doing the walk, not just the talk.

When it is for someone I love, family or friends, no problem.

Not strong. Just love.

#love#notbeingstrong#justdoingthewalknothetalk#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

THE SOUNDS OF THE MORNING WALK-MORE THAN QUIET

 Back to regular morning walking with 2 lb weights felt good.

I am going up that sloping hill a little faster every day.

Today paying attention to the sounds.

So many different birds in the field and along the street chirping away.

Around the Central Library to go a short way along Yonge Street near Major Mackenzie brought the noise of traffic. Those cars stopping and those starting up.

Then down Atkinson to the quieter Hopkins to reach the park. Just two people doing Tai Chi to a recording.

Our family calls it Grandpa's Park. It is where the grandchildren still play. Well the younger ones.

Adolph loved having time with the grandkids there.

Passing the memorial bench for Adolph. Can't help but to give a quick blown kiss.

Back down the park path to Harding and then home.

Paying attention to the world around me helps to keep me grounded.

The morning walk is good exercise. But it is walking meditation. I think less about a lot of things and just concentrate on enjoying the walk.

#morningwalk#walkingmeditation#listeningtothesoundsoftheday#gettingoutofmyhead#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

MAY MY FAVOURITE MONTH COMING TO AN END!

 May with the hope of many warm months and times ahead.

I love the trees turning green.

The orchestra of spring bulbs blooming making the garden a wonderful showcase.

Warmer weather means more outside time.

And I am back to walking again. With my two pound weights. Made the walk 10 minutes longer so I pass by Adolph's plaque in the park. A feel good time.

So this morning stopped to take a cell phone pic of some pretty pink flowers.

 Just down the street but lovely.

What do you enjoy about May?

#may#myfavouritemonthismay#pinkflowersinmay#enjoyingwalkingagain#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

JOURNALING HELPS DURING THOSE DIFFICULT TIMES! ESPECIALLY GRIEF!

 Journaling helps during difficult times.

As a professional Social Worker, I knew all the jargon and talk any therapist would give me.

When my beloved Adolph was sick, I really did not want to share so many intimate feelings with anyone.

Besides the privacy thing. Did Adolph want me to share?

So a journal on my computer was my outlet. I would bang away.

Thoughts.

Swear words.

Negative.

You got it.

It worked.

So for 2 years after retirement it was my go to therapy.

Adolph's nurse would ask if I talked with anyone. No I journal.

I did not need counselling.

My family and some close friends filled in the gap beyond journaling.

Then because I dealt with his dying and death so well, I am told I am strong. Not everyone is so strong.

I do not see it that way. I just feel I loved him and it was the loving thing to do.

Besides like I have said so often. Caring for him was the easy part, living without him has been the hard part.

#journalingthroughgrief#griefandjournaling#therapyisnotforeveryone#dealingwithgriefanddying#dealingwithalovedonesdeath#missingthemanyourloved#caringforhimwastheeasypart,livingwithouthimhasbeenthehardpart#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

WHY DOES ANYONE SAY CARING FOR A LOVED ONE IS A BURDEN? ACTUALLY SUCH A LIFE HONOUR!

 When I try to state how being there and caring and loving my spouse Adolph during his last years was one of life's honours, you know what I am often told- oh you were a caregiver.

No not a caregiver- a wife, a lover, a supporter.

Then one guy when I was chatting who knew Adolph, said he was a burden.

Why does anyone think loving and caring for someone would be a burden?

I remember a family member saying Nonna Maria- Adolph's Nonna was a burden and it was better she died.

People live a life. How the life ends is beyond us?

The love and care any of us give our loved ones may be recognition that they deserve a dignified and loving end of life.

Both Adolph and Nonna Maria had been such wonderful human beings who went out of their way for others their whole lives.

Our lives have many changes. 

For the record any day of care was so meaningful. Living with him was the easy part. Living without him has been the hard part!

#notaburden#lovingsomeonebringsuchmeaningtolife#caringforsomeoneyouloveislife'shonour#missinghimeveryday#lovingandleavingarehardpartsoflife#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

LANGSTAFF SECONDARY SCHOOL AND SO MANY MEMORIES- 1964-1969

Langstaff Secondary School had so many events and activities over the years I attended 1964-1969.

 

A fun event with so many students performing. Does anyone have a memory of what was performed?

Adolph in his Mexican Hat at Our Thing. The last event we attended at the school.

I think he was representing the Spanish Class.

 Do you have fun memories of your school activities!

#langstaffsecondaryschool#ourthingajuneeventatlangstaffsecondaryschool#barbaraandadolphattendedlangstaffsecondaryschool#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro

LANGSTAFF SECONDARY SCHOOL MEMORIES-THE PROM MAY 15 1969

 May 15 1969 the Prom was held at the Old Mill.

Since it was so late in the year, it did not make it to the annual yearbook.

I was Prom Queen. Won by 200 votes.

My photo album page.

After I was crowned the Queen.

It was a time before selfies and copious pictures. Luckily someone at the Prom snapped some pictures for me.

Proms are here again.

Enjoy your special night.

#langstaffsecondaryschool#langstaffsecondaryschoolprom#1969promatlangstaffsecondaryschool#barbarapark#barbaraparkinpromqueen#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro