THIRTY DAYS HATH SEPTEMBER

September- the short month, one of 4 short months. It seems with one day less not as much gets done but it actually does. A month of new beginnings, finishing summer projects, and preparing for the months ahead. Even that notorious celebration of Christmas- thinking about it and starting some shopping. Yes I know there are people out there that are finished. However, waiting to see what the grandchildren need and what they might want is the reason to wait. Of course October brings two wonderful celebrations- Thanksgiving and Halloween! Septmeber has been an eventful month- joy, some sadness, some celebrations. Well an usual month. Don't they all start to sound the same?  The biggest joy is just to keep on trekking! Plugging along! Finding meaning in each day! Just finishing what gets started! Life is good, isn't it?

CANADIAN FALL IMAGES ABOUND AROUND US

Fall brings the foods and smells and events that are fun. Cranberries at the markets. Apple picking is one at the local farms.

Some farms will have fun events for children too.

Old barn wood fences.

Maple Leaf picture potential. Try a drive in the country for the changing of the colours. Even in downtown Toronto there are Fall images.

Gather some pine cones for a decorative basket by the door or for a festive fall table. Fall brings many fun opportunities. And the driving is easy!

NANA SAYS GRIEF IS A DIFFICULT ONE FOR CHILDREN

When someone in a family dies, there is always a dilemma on how much to involve children. Age and the degree of relationship to the person are factors. Someone very close may mean the child needs to be part of the funeral process. Distant relative or friend, the child may be told but not need to be involved. Parents struggle with this. Viewing a body in a casket can be traumatizing for childrren. Does a child need to see the person? There are differing views on the subject. Unfortunately there is no right or wrong answer. Having a child draw a picture, write a poem or story can be a way to be involved. Part of the post funeral wake and meal is easier. Talking about feelings. It is sad. We will miss the person. Maybe a trip to the cemetery at a later date will bring some discussion. Letting feelings be real and raw can be frightening for children too. Seeing a parent cry may be hard. But it is real and part of life. There are many resources and story books on various deaths. I have one when Granma Dies. So a theme workbook or book may be a way to include the child. Parents can ask others for guidance on what to do. However, a parent knows their own child best. What works for one child may not work for your child.

AFTER DEATH COMES THE GRIEF

Living with someone facing the end of his/her life is such a painful journey. After death the grief work continues in a different way. There are many services and helps out there. But sometimes a good book giving solace is warranted. In my End of Life talk for Nursing Mentorship, I suggest C.S. Lewis- A Grief Observed. It was his grief journey after the death of his wife. I often give a copy to family or friends going through a grief process. It is one small way a person can be comforted.

LIFE IS LIKE A DAY WITH QUILTS

One of the highlights of my summer of 2016 was an amazing quilt show at Black Creek Pioneer Village. The variety and colour of the quilts was wonderful.

Order, patterns, design- neatly constructed and put together.

Even a traditional pattern like the Log Cabin modernized. Did each quilt give an insight to its creator? Why that design? Why those colours? How long did it take?
Like life there can be variety! Taking an interest and visiting a show, a fair, an exhibit in a museum brings a connection with the art and the artist. Are quilts an art form? Fabric art at its best. Yes they can hang on a wall or in a museum but mostly they can go on a bed and keep us warm!

Oh the selection! Which one would you pick for a cuddle or snuggle?

THE BUSYNESS OF FALL-ARE YOU BUSY WITH FALL CLEANUP

There's a hustle and bustle in the air. School in full swing. Thinking about the next events like Thanksgiving. Turkeys are on sale. The Fall vegetables. Trees trying colour. Time for some photo opts! Of course, garden cleanup. Four bags to the curbs. Adolph needs to tie the branch bundles. A year to chop and cut back a very over grown and messy garden. Not fair to ask the snow to cover it up! It will still be there in the Spring. There is something about garden work. It clears the head. Chopping and bagging, no other thoughts, just slow methodical work. After a stressful and sad week, good for the soul. So busy to slow needed work. Slowly each week the garden is surrounding to Barb's efforts! Also slow efforts. No longer about to spend a whole day, now more like less than 2 hours and sometimes only 1! But like most valiant workers, every effort counts! Just doing something helps with the overall appearance. Like most tasks in life, getting started, doing and stopping when tired. Just to start over another day!

Fall#fallisabusytime#hustleandbustleofschool#lotsofeventslikethanksgiving#gardencleanup#fallcolours#rakingleavesinthefallishardwork#slowatthefallwork

CELEBRATE LIFE

Sometimes we all need a reminder to live our lives well. Some say to the fullest but some days are harder than others. Celebrate all the small journerys. Laugh, cry, yell but live. Take the opportunities of every day to find a silver lining! It is good for the soul!

FALL 2016 IS HERE

The never ending summer warmth has been such a blessing this year. September has allowed more outdoor eating and time to enjoy activities without jackets.

The trees are slowly turning to Autumn beauty. Driving is safe so country roads are manageable to meander. Even the drive to my daughter's home has some nice scenery.

Cranberries are ready-for eating with meals or baking or sometimes fun Fall crafts with children.
I think a trip to another market is warranted. Fall vegetables are ready for cooking so buying fresh from the farmers is still a pleasure.

THE FIGHT IS OVER, THE ILLNESS WINS

What ever battle your loved one is fighting- cancer, alzheimers, MS, ALS, old age- over time the illness wins. The body just can not take it anymore. As a clinician, I often hear by family or friends the loved one gave up. No they did not give up, the illness won. No one really wants to die and leave their loved ones. If there were another treatment, some more time, something else to try, it would have been tried. You be the strong one. You keep on trying. You keep the spirits up for your loved one. Take the pressure and energy off! No matter what-it hurts to your core to lose someone you love! Remember to take care of yourself!

NANA SAYS STEP BACK AND LET CHILDREN TRY

Children like anyone learn by trial and error. The first time a bed is made, it usually lumpy. Swim classes teach that a child may have to do one level several time before completing it. A High School or University student tries out for a team and is not selected. Life has challenges but helping children learn to deal with the wins and the loses are lessons. Call on your own experiences of failure and how you turned it around. I reflect on my career and how many job interviews lead nowhere! Helping a child to keep seeing their strengths and worth is important. What skills to keep improving? What does the child really want to do? What does the child love? When a child wants to help a parent, let the child do it their way too! Let there be a mess! Let colours not match in clothes selection! Nevertheless take a step back and let the child try!

SAYING GOODBYE TO SUMMER 2016

With Fall around the corner, time to reflect on the 2016 summer. Hot and sticky would describe most of it. But great anyway. Farmers market trips, reading books, genealogy updates, crafts, time with the grandchildren and really enjoying those lazy, hazy days of summer. Feeling renewed and rejuvenated Fall bring it on. Already in the swing of trying to move forward with stuff. The decluttering of my life- stuff, garden, house and clearing the clutter in my head! Trying to keep the positive thoughts and discarding the negative ones. Letting go of the past- that clutter is hard! Photos from summer reviewed and maybe a photobook or scrapbook- haven't decided yet. Once review of the favourite photos is done, a photo journal post would be coming. Summer lets us relax. So trying to capture that feeling should be a Fall goal as well! What did you love about your summer? Or are you a Fall person with the cooler weather?

TORONTO-SPORTS HAVEN

There are sports events year round. Of course, The Blue Jays- baseball, The Argonauts-football, The FC-soccer, The Raptors- basketball and The Toronto Maple Leafs- hockey. And the Marlies!

The Rogers Centre- I still like the name Skydome, oh well and the Air Canada Centre host many events.
 Just had a beach volleyball tournament held here with international players. Last year's Pan Am Games still resonate with me! Sports at younger levels have Elementary and High Schools and Universities playing their games. Track is good. Volleyball is good. And all sports that one participates. There are the amateur road runners and joggers out every day in the GTA. Then there are the walkers!
I think the Grey Cup is coming back to the city. So if not an athlete, at least there is lots to see and teams to applaud! How about your place- what are your sports? Do you enjoy the participation?

YOU CAN'T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS!

Fall- a time to declutter and do some cleaning. One ad had advice on how to declutter the kitchen. My first thought, take my husband out of there and it would be neater, the cupboards stay clean etc. However I would have to cook and clean! Can't have it both ways. So a cluttered kitchen in order to eat well!
In life we often ask for things that have two sides. On a work day would like to sleep more but the job calls. For those out of work, the luxury of a job outweighs the extra sleep.
Busy parents with little ones- would like to have more time. For empty nesters, would like to have children in the home! Get the picture.
We often want everything but they can be at opposite ends! So both ways! NOT usually! Those tired of hot humid days want it cooler but when the snow arrives, not quite what they wanted.
Finding time to have it both ways! Projects in between work! But finding the energy! Babysitting commitments take time but then time with the little ones. Sleepovers can be easier with the older ones as they allow for some personal things to get done. A little both ways!
Some would like to travel but the work and energy to make it happen. Of course the money. Home rennovations versus travel costs! Both ways-hum! What kind of travel! Some want the beach and all inclusive. Some want the sites! If with one couple, hard to have it both ways. A river cruise in Europe! Might work?
Oh to have things both ways takes planning! And it may not work after all! Okay so maybe one way will work! But whose one way?

FRIDAYS-TGIF

Fridays no matter how busy or stressful brings us into the weekend. Especially the first 5 day week in September as everyone is now in full swing of the new school year and fall lineup. The weekends are a time to readjust to the lessons and the schedule it brings. For the backup team of grandparents, the days and nights that some help is needed for the busy working daughters. Tired- everyone looks tired these days as the adjustment is made! Oh Friday that long anticipated day of the week!

A CANADIAN DRIVE IN THE COUNTRYSIDE

Leisurely drives in the countryside bring a sense of relaxation. Stopping at a roadside coffee shop and taking in the air brings a sense of connection with the land. Not far from my home are locations of ancestral homes. As the trees turn from green to fall colours, the drives become more beautiful. Ontario offers some pretty sites as do other provinces of Canada.

Sometimes trying to decide which way to go. Then a small country market comes into view so time to buy some more fresh farm vegetables. Do you like country drives? Isn't it fun to drive in one direction for an hour and see what you find?

NANA SAYS GRANDPARENTS ARE YOUR BACKUP TEAM

Grandparents day was September 11th, little poignant as it is another famous day too. Having loving parents that want to spend time with your children is a bonus of family. Not a perfect family- it does not exist. Knowing some couple time can be had away from the kids who are in good hands. Older children get to have sleepovers. My grandchildren are still excited to spend time at our house. Try to make it children friendly with activities especially crafts. Lots of supplies to be used. A basement for ball activities and running around in cooler weather. Of course the yard is a good place all year round.  Food always helps. Healthy and snacks! It is work to be a grandparent. Relationships come with effort and time. The energy level is not there anymore so how to let the children do the running and use their energy while lovingly supervised. Try bunny hopping across the floor several times with a two year old! Well you get the picture. With the really little ones get down on the floor with them, then they can crawl all over you!  Grandparents are a vital part of family. Some are willing to be more involved than others! Whatever the involvement use it well!

FALL FUN IS BEGINNING IN CANADA

Fall activities are in full swing. Even though summer is not officially over. Farms with events for all ages can be found coast to coast.

Too early for apple picking and buying a pumpkin. But time to visit and buy those fresh vegetables still abundant at markets.

                                         The last hurrah of colour in the garden. 

GRANDPARENTS DAY

Being a grandparent is one of life's special privileges. Seeing one's children grow into parents and give these sweet, loving people into the older generation's life is a blessing. Grandparenting can be like parenting. Discipline, saying no, lots of hugs, kisses, love and mostly time. Establishing a good relationship means time and commitment. Being there. Being present. So Grandparents Day is special but every day having grandchildren in one's life is special. So here's to the grandchildren. If one lives long enough the greatgrandchildren!

REMEMBERING SEPTEMBER 11TH

15 years and we are still standing! How has the world changed? Still too many conflicts related to that event. New York has survived. But people that were  in the city that day are having health issues and some have passed away. PTSD from that day have many not moving forward. Others have embraced the tragedy and lived to prove good can come from adversity!  I was on the phone all day long with my oldest daughter at her work as we saw the day unfold. Downtown Toronto office buildings emptied. Reminds me my youngest daughter was in Milan beginning her studies with Adolph helping to settle her in the city. He was delayed coming home. I remember when he arrived at the airport as his flight was part of the bunch of flights that started again after all planes had been grounded in North America. I met him and linked arms as we scurried to the car. The joy of people greeting loved ones at the airport. What were their stories? I remember the quiet in the morning for many days after September 11th as no planes were going over my house. Canadians in cities across the country putting up stranded passengers.Then one morning as I was putting out the garbage, a plane from the west- a red eye was in the sky. The relief that life was returning to a new normal. Hearing the planes later in the day as flights came from Europe and the West at that time. What was the logistic story of getting North America flying again? Over the years watching various documentaries on the day from different people's perspectives builds on the immense story of the day and weeks afterwards. Those visiting New York now go to the site of the Twin Towers! The memorial that is there brings meaning to people in different ways! Knowing the stories of the Canadians who died there is poignant! Some from the GTA! Time does seem to heal and life goes on! Trust is not always there for many people! Although it was not the first surprise event on North America soil nor conflict! Like other days in history for many of us- JFK, Viet Nam,Space Shuttle, personal tragedies! Memories and moments come flooding back into our conscience! Are we older and wiser? Are our securities systems much better without us knowing? Hope so!

CTV SEPTEMBER 10 FILM YOUR DAY

I actually woke up at 5 am this morning and began this one day project. I just hope my little camcorder I accidentally programmed in Korean and not English is doing okay. I did the day in the life of the world May 15, 2010. The pictures that were selected were varied and basic. So my life is quite basic so filming Adolph and me during the normal basic things on a Saturday. Do an audio of why you love Canada, any fears about the future. You can make yours fancy and creative if you want. The instructions at the CTV website are easy to follow. Film your day and go to the website that tells where to submit. We all have until the middle of October. I am sure photo enthusiasts are doing this anyway. But if not you have until midnight to finish. The goal is to capture the lives of Canadians and some videos will be selected for the documentary around the date of the 150th anniversary of Confederation, I guess next July 2017. The chances of mine being selected are remote but apparently all submissions will be put somewhere for future use. I know my 2010 picture submitted can be retrieved at their website. So film yourself and who you are Canadians. Tell your little story.

WHAT IS LOVE?

Love is important in our lives. When we feel loved, we feel human. For those without people in their lives they often turn to the love of pets. For many their cat or dog brings companionship and touch. Babies grow from being fed but also loved and held. So what is this feeling of love? How do we tell as humans the difference from liking someone and really loving someone? True love often means the other is our soulmate. But people can stop loving someone. When does love stop? Why do we love our hometown, our province, our country? Where does the love come from inside us? We use the word in many ways. I love my morning coffee. Don't you just love that actor in that film! Thanks for the gift- I really love it! Love that word that can make and break a day and sometimes a life. Children can become adults thinking their parents really did not love them. Sometimes it is true as a parent can have a favourite child and the other feels. I was asked one day at work by a colleague which grandchild I loved the most since he was his grandmother's favourite. I looked at him and said all of them but especially whichever one I happen to be hugging or holding at the time. The number 6 is important- 6 separate chambers of love in my heart for each of my grandbabies! I love them all but each brings different personalities and wonderful aspects to observe and love! For me then the love of family! What does love mean to you? Who and what do you love? How big is your heart?

DOES HARD WORK ALWAYS HAVE A REWARD?

Hard work does not always have a reward. It is good to pay one's dues in life but sometimes bad things happen. Disasters, job losses, health issues, death of loved ones. Some people think they are owed because I worked hard all my life. Most people work hard  for their living. It does not mean that everything you did will get rewarded. A paycheque for the work done comes after it. Saving for retirement does not always mean there will be a privileged one. Those ads with 50 somethings sailing away in sailboats may be the reality for a few. Raising one's family does not mean the family will be a happy one. Some adult children have problems and issues beyond your control. Your hard work as a parent may not give the reward you wanted. So should we work hard? Absolutely! Hard work builds character. But remember to work smarter too! Don't waste time and energy! Learn to do activities in fewer steps! Live in the present to make the most of every day! Hard work means hard relazation! To balance life with both. Getting the boring chores out of the way to do the hard work on the activities or hobbies enjoyed. If you are able to work hard, count it as a blessing! Being healthy enough to continue working whether in a job or retirement is a real asset1! If lucky some of that hard work will pay off in some ways! Just keep on going to see where!

DREAMS-CAN THEY GIVE A MESSAGE

Some therapists use dreams to interpret events in a client's life. Some people have dreams that give advice. Others find they connect them with those who have died. Some people do not dream at all or do not remember their dreams. Religion, cultures, interest groups have used dream interpretation for their own use. My dreams are story lines so some mornings it seems as if I have been working all night. I would just rather sleep and not have any storyline. My husband does not remember his dreams and has a more restful sleep. Then they can be nightmares- scary but once awake the realization it is not real. I used to try to connect what I was dreaming with my day life. But too much work. I usually am just glad to be awake and back to reality. How about you? Dreams? Do they give you advice? Are they good, happy, indifferent? For me I would like to dream I am sitting on a beach watching the waves gently roll in!

NANA SAYS SIT DOWN AND LEARN

With the children back to school, lots of sitting and learning. Like a blank slate, children are sponges for new knowledge and ideas. Finding a suitable place in the home to do homework and projects that is a consistent space can be important. The kitchen table can be used occasionally but remember must be cleared off. So a spot that items can be left makes it easier. Yes a desk in a bedroom, that's what I used for peace of mind. Played my radio. But sometimes children need to be close to adults for the comfort level and being able to ask a question or even ask for help. While homework is occurring what are you doing as a parent! Housework, chores, maybe get a project of your own started and work along with the children. Don't forget to read to children. Even older children can benefit from hearing the printed word. Or have them read to you! Yes homework is a drag! It cuts into family time greatly. Let children be frustrated with it too! So find ways to get through it faster and without headaches and heartache. So you can sit down and have some family time!

A CANADIAN FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL

Parents prepared for the last month with new clothes, lunch boxes and knapsacks. The wise parents wait to buy everything as the teacher will send a list of what is needed at school. Grandparents often pitch in with a clothes item and some pocket money for the children. I learnt the hard way. One year I bought all the cute outfits my daughter wanted then her friends were wearing different clothes so she did not want to wear those clothes! Of course there are those first day of school pictures. I have a few of my girls. Cute and memorable! Although not a new year, it always feels like one. For children the year is September to June. College and University end in April. There is a funny sense of excitement in the air. Looking forward to seeing friends. Maybe starting a new school or going to High School for the first time. Traffic has returned with a vengeance! Luckily living close to work really helps with that part of the return! For workers, back to the normal. Meetings are back. No more coverage for fellow colleagues. Catching up on all the news. Bragging about who did more and went the farthest! I do not play this game. I had a good summer and that's that! I'll look forward to seeing my grandkiddies and back to school pictures. Hoping they will like their teachers. And their teachers will like them. Teachers do have pets and sometimes students they dislike! Human nature! My children had some great teachers but not all teachers are great. I even remember a couple I loved from my childhood. Excitement for the day but also little sad the summer is over. Yes I know not officially until September 22 but the lazy days are gone! First days can bring good days. So here's to all the children- enjoy your day then tell your waiting grandparents about it!

LABOUR DAY MONDAY

The last of the summer long weekends is here. A sadness that the Fall season will Rev up. School, work meetings, children's lessons, organizing for the new season, planning social events. The day is a time to reflect and well labour. What needs to be done in the yard, the house, the cleaning of the closets, organizing the photos and memorabilia from summer events, taking those winter woollies to the dry cleaners- labour day is the word for many reasons! Most women labour today. Getting everything organized for the first week back to school. For those of us without children, a good day to plan and organize those work areas. I just uploaded a new database to put my information- Evernote. Anyone else use it for their stuff? A corner of my bedroom for those quiet projects that can be done while watching TV. I have been getting lazy and just been watching without anything in my hands. So back to labour and busy but slow busy. The bedroom projects are slow ones. If an hour or so each night then something can be accomplished. Of course the computer room has the writing projects. Not fun to sit at a computer all day and all night so by taking some small projects elsewhere then can change the venue change the mood. For example, if I do two rows on my afghan stitch project then eventually it will get done. But slowly. There is always the boredom factor. Some projects are boring so having several to do can switch from one to the other to keep up the interest. Currently I am retyping and reorganizing some family histories. I find the typing or inputting of data boring but love the research piece. So  a little research, and a little typing keeps projects moving along but slowly. I have been going over all the data and trying to link with the cited sources. It's all there but reorganizing means filtering the paper. One goal is to reduce the paper and binders of the family history stuff. Then the new scanner to be installed. I needed the database to have a place to put the scanned stuff. Several family history documents are big and needed a place digitally. The word of modern family historians is to reduce the paper and be digital. Then they can be filed online and sent to relevant family members as a file or put on this blog to be read whichever is easiest for me. It is only the beginning of the season so getting started was the important part. I also find learning a new programme or installing a new device is pain staking. Unfortunately I do not have an electronic, computer savvy spouse so any new gadget takes more time for me than others to get it functional, I assume! So Labouring on this Monday can be tiring but needed. Workstations for those mentioned jobs are going well! I even found a moment to do a post!

LIFE IS A CANADIAN BEACH

Oh the beach. Does not have to be the best one in the world but just a place to place one's butt.

A chair by the water!

Fun to be out and about!

Water brings nature like the Wood ducks. So a pleasant day trip to a lake north of the city with family was delightful.

Muskoka chairs are a must for any Canadian lake side view.
Deerhurst Inn near Huntsville Ontario on Pennisula Lake!Deerhurst
#deerhurstinn#muskokachairs#ducksinthewater#reflectivethoughtsbybarbara#barbaradimambro#lifeisabeach#funbythebeach#let'sgotothebeach#huntsvilleontario

THE COOL OF SEPTEMBER IS HERE

After a very hot, humid summer, the cool winds of September make sleeping easier. Those bothered by the heat will be enjoying each day more. Weather that favourite topic of most Canadians returns with a bang. The in between weather- Fall can be anything! For most of us time to leave home and work easily without all the dressing up of layers of clothes! And boots! So relish any more warm days they really are less work! Garden cleanup means the weeds will not come back for another year. September with back to school is renewed energy to do homework. For workers, some evening projects at home. Give yourself some homework to do, so to speak. For me, the writing of various research projects. Write, publish and put on the blog. If needing to veg in front of the TV, put a craft project in my hands! Remember it is still summer as Fall does not officially arrive until late September! So continue to enjoy the parks, lakes and all your favourite places. As the Fall colours change, get out and take pictures of the landscape.  But getting started with the busier items due to the change in season starts now! Cool weather needs energy to keep warm- if busy the body heats up!

Country drives! Short simple local ones are always fun! Just a drive to see family in Aurora takes me up a country road! So September, grab onto your energy and go! Slow is okay!