AREN'T YOU LUCKY?

Have you ever gone through hard times and you just try to put on a happy face? No compaints! Choosing to be someone others want to be around! Since you are not a woe is me person, do others ever tell you, you are so lucky, you have a perfect life, nothing bad ever happened to you! How do you respond?  Do you give a list of everything harsh you have survived or like I do, you just smile, hoping the inconsiderate person can not read your mind!

A POSTCARD FROM ANTIGUA

In 1964, my folks went on a vacation to Antigua, British West Indies.

I love the old dresses. Postcards give a social picture of a set time.

They stayed at the Blue Waters Hotel. I wonder if it is still there. The card in the middle is of the Anchorage Hotel at Dickinson's Bay. Nelson's Dockyard was the main tourist attraction as seen by the card in the top left corner.

As with many islands in the Caribbean, there is an annual carnival time. The beaches look so pristine, don't they? My mother loved the island and in her usual fashion, she wanted to go live there! No matter where she visited, she always wanted to take us all there! Has anyone been to this beautiful island lately? What are your thoughts?
If you want a postcard featured here, email me at abdm@rogers.com and I will send you my address so you can send me a postcard.

RUNNING/WALKING FOR A CAUSE

We see them on TV- a run, a walk, a swim, a bike ride for a cause. There are usually lots of people- just faces in a crowd. Yet each family, couple, individual may be doing it for their own special reason. Yesterday- the Kerr Family- performed such an event for a special lady that died last April from pancreatic cancer- it was their cause. Not just  faces- people I knew and loved. Does it help with the grieving process? Probably. But it was very proactive and let everyone do something.Perhaps to help someone else with the terrible disease.  Have you participated in a cause? Did it help with your loss? Did it give hope for a better tomorrow?

HAVE YOU BEEN PHISHED?

Phishing is the new way for others to try to get our information online. An email will arrive looking like it came from a contact sometimes with a correct email address with a link to click then asking for personal information. The smart people just delete it! Our usual contacts always send similar items so if it looks out of character then be suspicious. Recently I was adamantly accused of sending such an email even though I tried to reassure the person- not from me! So if in doubt just delete any email or links that do not appear to be legitimate. Some of the scams are ones for example that look like they are coming from a bank. If you do not have an account with that bank, you know for sure it is a scam email. Remember the ones for years from Nigeria- you have inherited!!! Sure!! Don't you just love the word- phish! I wonder if it will make it into the next edition of the Webster dictionary?

BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER

Actually swans and ducks at the Mill Pond in Richmond Hill illustrate the idea of people gravitating towards people with the same ideas or interests. Although it is said opposites attract and even mate, there are often more similarities than differences in most relationships. In the work environment, the complainers find each other, the hard workers find each other and the friendly nice people find each other- everyone avoids the ones who are not similar!  Our friends tend to have similar natures, otherwise it becomes too difficult to spend time with negative people in a social situation. There can be lively debate and differences of opinions of course as it keeps activities alive. At the end of it all, there is usually a friendly compromise! So when you review your own flock, who do you see? Is it like looking in a mirror?

SHOULD WE INFANTILZE OUR ELDERLY?

As a clinical Social Worker, it often comes to my attention that it is difficult to know when to give advice to our elderly folks and when to allow them to live their lives the way they have lived. Taking away favourite foods or drinks to preserve the health of someone who is elderly and has- well elderly body parts can become a dilemma for family members! For example, many Nursing Homes will let the resident have a beer daily if it was part of the lifestyle and does not interfere with medications. Others will not as their care becomes micromanaged.  Many doctors who deal with Geriatrics will not do unnecessary blood tests as the body chemistry changes as we age . What was normal at 40 may not be the person's new normal at 91! It is sometimes easier to start to treat our elderly parents as "children" because it takes us away from the emotional piece- sadness of seeing them not as functional as they once had been! The old sibling rivalries may emerge- who is the better child and does more for the parent! There are no right or wrong answers when it comes to doing and loving our elderly folks! Each child must have their own unique relationship and continue to engage with their parent without the interference of others. In my practice I encourage my families to find their way with their parent. Offering strategies to work on it.  To find peace and love as the end of life is around the corner for our loved is hard! Are you struggling with an aging parent? Do you find yourself in dilemmas? Do you find the old sibling rivalries rear their ugly heads? What do you do to make it work?

NANA SAYS HIGH TECH VERSUS LOW TECH

With all the High Tech gadgets around it is difficult sometimes to encourage children to use other resources at hand. However, little children tend to gravitate towards items they find that are fun. In one of my daughters' basement the big box which the Fridge was packaged has become a playhouse. The grandchildren love the sticks and pinecones in the yard to gather and use. My granddaughter made a beautiful princess scarecrow for Thanksgiving out of a stick and scraps I have in a bin in my craft room. They need to use the computer and work a keyboard to keep up with modern times but using a variety of media to learn is important too.