THE CASSINO WAR MEMORIAL

Was an emotional experience for me. I visited there in 1991 on a trip to my husband's hometown- Cassino, Italy. I blogged about that experience November 1, 2010- Was I worth their sacrifice- Cassino War Cemetry and November 2, 2010- Cassino War Memorial Part 2. As we reflect on this Remembrance Week, I always remember the visit there of seeing so many graves with Canadian service men from all parts of Canada. They made the ultimate sacrifice-gave their lives. Today we can consider the lives given in our current missions. The young men and women that will always be remembered and honoured by the families who will miss them. Many of our elderly veterans are grateful for the new generation of young Canadians who are honouring them due to the current losses. The Afghanistan and other missions have brought a new awareness to all of us. No one really wins a war when there are lives lost- whether military or civilans! May we remember all sides in the battles and pray together for more peaceful resolutions to conflicts!

NANA SAYS GIVE SIBLINGS INDIVIDUAL TIME

In our busy lives, it is much easier to try to do everything together. Give the children their baths together to reduce the bedtime routine. Drag everyone shopping together.  However children at different ages and stages need and want different activities. The baby sits and plays with the toys at his/her feet. The toddler wanders and explores. The 3 year old may sit and watch a movie or do a puzzle or want a book read. Then the imaginary play begins. So a 5 year old with an imagination gets frustrated with a baby. A teenager is bored watching his/her 8 year old sibling. Yes, children need to relate and respect each other. It is the parents that want them to get along all the time even though there are differences. Children of all ages can have chores and expectations to pull their weight. The 3 year old can put their shoes neatly at the door and take the dishes from the table to the sink. The older child can be expected to help at a different level- garbage duty, household tasks. But each child is their own unique person. For example, group family pictures are fun but remember to include individual shots of each person too. When one child has a birthday party, do something special with the other child or children. Don't compare intelligence. "Why can't you get A's in math like your sister?" Find the strengths in each child and nurture. I know-it takes time and " I am so busy!" Perhaps make a list on a daily basis of one simple activity to do with each child. Again, I know-homework can get in the way so perhaps, individual time with each child during homework time. Remember-do they have to do it together at the same table- individual spots may help. Would it reduce the fighting- probably! If there are two parents, then divide the time between the two of you. But alternate the tasks too! Each child does need special time with each parent. Do you find it difficult to complete all the work to be done every day? What have you found that helps to give your children individual attention? Have you noticed patterns when the fighting starts? What do you do about it? Does one parent do more for the children? Why do you think this happens? Are there simple changes you can make that would help? Tell me your thoughts!

WE STAND ON GUARD FOR THEE

Are words known to all Canadians. As we honour and reflect this week leading up to Remembrance Day, why not try to find a person on a memorial wall who died in one of the conflicts where Canadians served and research the background. Or simply visit a memorial, reviewing the names. It is not possible for everyone to attend a service. Or when travelling the Highway of Heros on the 401 in Toronto, remember those who served in our Afghanistan mission. Where can you go in your home community? Will you be attending a service? I think I will walk up to the memorial in Richmond Hill this week to pause and reflect.

THE BIGGER PICTURE

By looking out a window from several stories high in any building, we can see a broader view of any location. Like the picture above- trees, old train, new bus, modern buildings, people, garbage cans, circular city park and so on. Using our observation skills to determine what is there. But really looking! As we watch the scene it is in constant flux! In our lives it is a good exercise to take a step back, up, down or any direction, to gain some perspective and insight. For example, I took clusters of pictures from different stages of my life and family groups- my dad's side and my mother's side that had been in separate albums and put them under one roof- well it really is one album. To see my life together from one place. I weeded some pictures to give to others that may enjoy them better. Seeing a parent as a baby may be enjoyable to adult nieces and nephews. How many baby pictures do I need of my siblings? And duplicates? My view of my family has changed over the years. I am becoming the older generation very quickly as my parents are reaching the end. I find myself wanting to let go of some things but not sure what! When I climb a little higher and view again, it may become clearer! Do you like to take in larger views to reflect on your life? Can you just stop and see what is around you? Hurrying and missing parts of your life can be a habit! Can you find a spot that is enjoyable to you? Look at the picture again- do you see something different now?

A POSTCARD FROM EGYPT

I bought these postcards of Egypt years ago at any antique sale where other memorabilia was sold.  Egypt is on my bucket list of places to visit.
The card with the pyramids has writing on the front-May 24th- The waves of the desert are at our feet. Lawrence. The card is addressed to Miss Rosa Zellers, Alliance Ohio, U.S.A. It is difficult to make out the postmark but V.09 1:30 P.M. can be read-1909? V would be the latin 5. The message is simple- Cairo, 5/24. Reached here yesterday. Leave the 26th. L.H.S.
Travelling in the early 1900's meant someone with money may have written the card. As an Agatha Christie buff, these cards remind me of the settings in several of her books. I can almost hear Poirot solving a crime before lunch!
Have you been to Egypt? Were the pyramids spectacular? Did you enjoy the culture? Is it on your bucket list to visit?
If you want a postcard featured here, email me at abdm@rogers.com and I will send you my address so you can send me a postcard.

"IN FLANDERS FIELDS

The poppies blow"- is the first line of a poem written during World War One by a Canadian doctor, John McCrae. It inspired the use of the Red poppy worn proudly during the weeks leading up to Remembrance Day. John was proud of his poem's success  He died in January 1918 while serving as a physician at an army hospital.
Veterans Affairs Canada's website has valuable and insightful information about the Canadians' role in all the missions' served. For anyone wanting to review the history or research for projects it is wonderful source.
Many of my family members have served in both World Wars. A nephew-in-law recently served in Canada's mission in Afghanistan.
As we all wear our poppies proudly, it can be a reflection on past conflicts as well as a hope that current conflicts can have a peaceful resolution.
Are you honouring someone in your family who served when you wear the Poppy? Do you have a special story to tell?
"We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields."

AN ORDINARY LIFE

Is the title of some draft pages for a book I discovered during a family crisis visit out west while cleaning out my mother's desk. I perused a few paragraphs and put them aside to read at a later time. My mother always talked about wanting to write a book and have it published. I will probably put the pages in one of my many family history binders. Her recollection of her childhood in Toronto in the 1920's and 1930's will be useful information to other family members- siblings, grandchildren, cousins. So no book will be published but her efforts will not be wasted! Unfortunately, many children are not so kind as I. Many people clean out their parents' homes and throw out lots of little treasures without a second thought. It's junk! When my mother-in-law died 13 years ago, the grandchildren were given the opportunity to go through her personal items and take things that had meaning to them. For example,one of my daughters took a grey sweater she had knit. She still uses it as her comfy sweater with her PJ's. In our ordinary lives are momentos with meaning. Yes, items need to be weeded out. Items like books can be donated to charities or libraries. But did the person have a collection! I had a workmate once whose father had collected a vast number of books on Judaism- in English, Polish and Hebrew. She donated his collection to a leading university in Montreal. As we all know some books can be out of print and would be useful to students. A new home! My Dad when he passed away in 2007, had a collection of nature products- birds' eggs, stuffed ducks, butterflies etc.  that were dontaed to the Heritage Centre in Peterborough- it specializes in hunter and angler history in Ontario. My step-dad has many books on the Masons that will be given to an interested family member or find their way to the local Lodge. If pragmatic, such donations may warrant a tax receipt to help with the estate taxes.
Furniture often finds a new home. Many times will have actually increased in value. I have a desk from my Dad and an old Singer sewing machine from my husband's Mom in my home.
We are always warned when conducting genealogical searches to write up our notes and publish. Family members have often discarded all the efforts of their loved ones.
Even old letters and cards may give some interesting tidbits of long lost ancestors so take the time to review them. I found some letters and pictures my children had written to their grandparents that I will pass on to them.
What do you have in your ordinary life that could find a new home if your children and grandchildren were not interested? Have you had the experience of cleaning out a parental home? What did you save? Did you discover a secret?