FEBURARY-THE SHORT MONTH

With 28 days this year, February is quickly coming to an end. But what a month with record breaking cold spells and snowfalls in parts of Canada. The last time it was this cold in Ontario was 1979 which I remember as I was pregnant with my second daughter. There are high hopes that March will bring an early Spring but I doubt it as it is just another day so the lingering cold snap may stay. A productive month of indoor activities but of course not getting as much done as wanted due to just being tired. By the time a week is finished, I often find myself finished needing to slow down. Luckily there are slow, quiet activities to do. I am looking forward to the first burst of Spring. Somehow energy comes from within when the sun shines and outdoors is inviting me for a Spring walk. I have done enough winter walks all bundled up!  The daylight is coming back to us which is encouraging at dinner time as some sunlight gives us enjoyment, hope. For those with depression February is the heaviest month. According to a psychiatrist I know, March becomes Manic March. It is a difficult time for people who have manic phases of their disease. The transitions and daylight saving changes have a major impact. So individuals and families supporting them be attentive and kind. The time for some Spring cleaning and hauling things to the curb may begin for many people. For school children, the wonderful March Break is around the corner. For this blogger, looking for Spring themes and flowers and ideas- just hoping some burst of energy will inspire me to continue to be enthusiastic about most areas of my life. How about you? Are you just about done with winter? Are you hopeful Spring is around the corner or corners of your life?

RESILIENCY-WHERE DOES IT COME FROM

I have written periodically about resiliency. The dictionary tells us it means readily recovering from shock, depression, otherwise being buoyant-able to keep afloat or rise to the top like a liquid. The question- why do some people have more resiliency than others? Adversity kicks a person in the gut. Not everyone recovers. Some people can become the walking dead. Depressed, drugs, drinking and not recovering. Post-traumatic stress! Clinical depression! Adverse events leave scars but some do find a way to get up and get going again! There are so many sayings- when the going gets tough, the tough get going! So easy to say but harder to do. Allowing a time of grief and reconfiguring let's us move to the next steps in our lives. Resiliency is not for everyone. Sometimes it is easier to retreat and say to hell with the world! People in their middle age laid off from a dream job may never find the dream job again. Divorce, death, health issues are further kicks in the gut. The more adverse events faced, does it become harder to bounce back from them! Sometimes just getting up and putting one foot in front of the other. Going through a week with goals and a purpose to get up in the morning, is that resiliency? Should we judge others if they are not as resilient as we are? Think not! My children tell me I am a happy person- because I chose to be. There have been many areas of my life that have been adverse. Family, business, work, loss of loved ones- but to keep going means pulling deep inside and just do it! When the negative thoughts occur, I picture a bridge and a running river- water under the bridge, hoping it will wash away the bad and perhaps bring some solutions to continue with positive living. But there are days, I like my own quiet and not the negativity of others. Resiliency works better when surrounded by like people. Sometimes for me, just people my own age- but those without all the materialistic goals of the younger crowd and the obsession with having a wrinkle or two and having to look younger! Knowing that life does go on and this too may pass. If it does not, then oh well, just deal with it. Resiliency- a huge topic and lots of thoughts! What do you think? Do you have your own version of resiliency? Can it be as individual as the people in it?

THINK ABOUT BEING A BLOOD DONOR

The slogan- it's in you to give- is the motto of the Canada Blood Services. A simple way to help save a life. As a regular donor, I have a duty to encourage others to give. Call Canada Blood Services for more information or visit your local clinic to find out how to donate. Some people can not give for various reasons- understood. But if you can consider it- an easy way to give back to your community!

NANA SAYS HOW DO WE TEACH RESILIENCE IN CHILDREN

Reading a short article recently by Michelle Horton on helping children through traumatic events, the concept of resilience was discussed. As parents and grandparents we can not protect our children from traumatic situations. Life happens. Helping children to navigate their concerns helps. The experts say good parenting that includes empathy, unconditional love and honest acceptance are key factors. Parents and grandparents and other family members like close aunts or uncles must model resiliency. Check out your library or bookstore for books on the subject if you need more reading. As a professional social worker being available in crisis situations for individuals and families, providing guidance on next steps and where to go for further help, can be first steps in setting up resiliency. People can become stuck in their grief or misfortunes in life. How to navigate from those situations to positive living and learn from the situations. Sometimes being in a hole teaches us we do not want to be there for very long. Allowing all feelings from sad to mad to glad can be raging simultaneously. For example, if a child loses a parent at a young age, the parent has been lost for the lifetime. So be available at different times of the person's life as grief can resurface periodically. Like at a graduation, a wedding or a first baby! Resiliency is a huge topic so I will write more at another time.

LIFE IS LIKE BEING A GRANDPARENT

Grandchildren and the pleasure they bring has been missed by some. I know at least 3 people in my family/friendship circle that did not meet their grandchildren. They passed away too soon. One cousin died 6 weeks before her first grandchild was born. I think about the grandchildren born after a grandparent has died. Do I feel blessed to be able to part of my grand children's lives? You bet! I remember when my mother-in-law was dying, I told her I would tell my grandchildren about her. I have kept my promise- she is their Bis-Nonna- great-grandmother! Sometimes I mention her as their grandpa's mother. When my mother died, I told my grandchildren a little about her too. She actually had some pictures and knew about her great-grandchildren. Life brings different phases and stages. Some people we knew at a point in our lives did not meet the people we know now. I often think about how loved the little ones would be by the ones no longer around. Like my Unc who loved me! He would love all my kids and his great-grandchildren. So what is my point- my melancholy point- hug and love those who are with you today! When your grandchildren are running around and making lots of noise, try to enjoy the privilege of being part of their lives. Of course, go home to your quiet house knowing there will be another day!

THE AWARDS SEASON IS FINALLY OVER

For the past two months, one award show after the other has claimed a Sunday spot. The same stars and same accolades do drag it out. Some of our favourite movies win while others get shut out of the awards entirely. I usually manage to see 2 or 3 of the movies nominated. But I must be getting older as I have not made it to the end of one award show  yet. My sleep calls me. The reviews and reruns in the morning, in the papers and online give the highlights anyway. The fabulous gowns and I think all the people look fabulous are in overkill. How many evening dresses does one need in their closet. I miss Bob Hope being the emcee. I love movies and I have ones I like to see annually. Of course the classic Christmas ones like It's a Wonderful life and Scrooge. If I am feeling melancholy, Out of Africa is one I like. Ben Hur at Easter. Once in a blue moon, The Sound of Music which is Adolph's favourite. Whimsical romantic ones like French Kiss or Under the Tuscan Sun. Of course. Love Story that came out just before I was married.  Recently I bought The Best Marigold Hotel for $5.00 at Walmart. Pleasant British film with exceptional acting. It was a flick I missed at the theatre. I will not be seeing 50 Shades of Grey- just looks like soft porn. The younger generation is heading to see it in droves. There are some films still playing at the movies I still want to see. Will I try to see the winners from the Oscars? Hum- probably not! If thought is given to past winners, they often were not the box office winners. Sometimes what the masses likes to see does not filter down to the nominations. Those action films that are computer generated make lots of money- poor acting but fun for some audiences. The best thing is that movies are made for all to enjoy. The variety from drama to comedy to biographical to animation let's everyone find something to enjoy. Foreign films can be seen in some theatres. Of course being able to see in many venues from the movie theatre to one's TV and even on the little cell phones or do I have to call them smart phones and even tablets, allows accessibility to all. The large screen still gives the best viewing. So will the networks go back to some regular Sunday night shows. In my youth, Ponderosa was in the Sunday night slot. Then later, Murder She Wrote was popular. A lifetime can be experienced by the movies and shows watched. Of course, with all the technological equipment, the old home movies can be updated and put on modern devices. Sometimes those movies are actually the best. Why? Starring US- the family!! Do you have favourite movies that bring back memories? Or you just like to see them?

SNOW IS ALL AROUND

Lots of snow means lots of moisture for the Spring flowers. Somewhere under the snow the bulbs are waiting to emerge. I noticed the buds on the tree branches getting ready for the warmer weather. Just think Spring is just a month away!! Some birds are starting to flock back to us! Getting through winter- I think I can!